The Life and Times of a High School Drama Teacher

How indulgent...

2012-01-21T11:18:00.000-08:00

It's been a long time, a very, very long time. I find my interest in maintaining a blog comes and goes, I tend to journal more on paper than in a public forum (not that this is all that public, considering nobody reads it). I also find that I am not the eloquent writer that most bloggers are, but sometimes I still feel compelled to share, how indulgent of me, I know.

I truly do strive to be a better a writer and express myself in a way that is interesting and compelling. So, I continue to write, I continue to try, and I continue to improve.

Let the madness begin...

2011-02-13T13:58:00.000-08:00

I am currently assigning roles for my Spring play, "The Iliad, The Odyssey and all of Greek Mythology, in 99 minutes or less". I'm having a really hard time. I have a cast of 12, over 100 roles and less than 24 hours before the first rehearsal.

I'm really looking forward to this show. I think it can do a lot to revitalize the department (there's a lot of negativity flowing right now, but that's fodder for another post).

I cast several new students, did not do any "veteran perk" casting. I cast the kids I thought would do the best and work the hardest. Now, we just need to make it happen.

A Whole New Year

2010-09-08T16:56:00.000-07:00

It's a start of a new school year. A year of new beginnings. I'm looking forward to things taking a positive turn.

This school has a new principal and as much as I loved the last one, I think the school was ready for a change. You can actually feel the positive energy.

I'm looking forward to a good year.

long time...

2010-06-18T10:32:00.000-07:00

no post...

Not that it really matters, I don't think anybody ever read this to begin with. But I will plug along and right now I'm considering changing the name to "Things that Piss me off". I'm dealing with a lot of that right now. The most pressing issue....

My neighbors brought me a stay pit bull puppy last Saturday morning. They brought her to me because I have pits, love pits and know people who do pit rescue. So, I have spent the last week having my heart ripped out as I try to find her a new home. I don't know what I'm doing, I'm not a rescue. I have called people, emailed, posted on facebook. Reached out anyway I can think of and yet this adorable little girl still lives in my garage and half my back yard. My girl doesn't like her so I can't put them together. Keeping her isn't an option for me because we have two and are looking to adopt kids.

Now for what really pisses me off...the neighbors haven't offered to help feed, walk, train or find her a home. The one time I have talked to one of them about what is going his response was "she has found a home, three doors down" indicating my house. I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to get over the anger I feel toward them right now. I have already decided I am not going to the July 4 neighborhood party. I don't want to be around them.

Today, that is what pisses me off.

Beginning Students

2009-12-16T08:30:00.000-08:00

Today I am working with groups of students on stage as they prepare their final scenes. The group that is set to work with me right now has no idea where their scene takes place. They have had the scripts for several weeks, don't know where it takes place and one of them doesn't know what the script is about. What in the world have they been doing for the past 3 weeks? And will they pass their final? Probably not.

Have you ever...

2009-12-15T11:24:00.001-08:00

felt like you were spiraling out of control? Or were at the bottom of a deep, dark pit and couldn't claw your way out?

I feel this amazing sadness engulfing me each day. In the last several months I have had 5 days of what I would call truly relaxing happiness. A time where I felt like I could be me and who that "me" was was accepted by the people I was with.

I am tired of spending most of my days feeling like I don't belong, feeling like I can't do anything right, feeling like a failure.

YIKES!

2009-11-05T11:24:00.000-08:00

I just had an AP in my classroom to tell me that there is a student in one of my theatre classes who is mentally ill, they are suspecting bi-polar but don't know for sure. The mom has been informed that she needs to take the kid to see a doctor, if she doesn't he won't be allowed back on campus.

Now, here is the yikes part...he says he has two sides in him, "good X" and "angry X". The "angry X" is telling him to hurt me. This is why he has ran out of my room on various occasions. Normally it is during a rehearsal day and him walking away from me isn't case for referral. A week ago he did it during a class activity, so I wrote him up.

I got an email from his counselor telling me he was having "emotional" issues and if he wasn't in my class he was either with her or the school psyc. The AP talked to the two women about the issue and asked if I had been told what was going on. They told him no. He doesn't know why they were choosing not to tell me, but he thought I should know and told me he is going to do everything to make sure I was safe and felt it best that I know what was going on. Apparently so far "good X" has been able to control "angry X", but it is getting harder, which is why he bolts from my room. The AP says as far as they can tell he doesn't know why I am the target.

I know this is rambling, I'm a bit shaken. And obviously needed to get it off my chest.

Ex-Wives Should be Shot

2009-10-30T15:18:00.000-07:00

Okay, not all, but a goodly portion of them.

M's ex-wife has ruined yet another holiday/vacation for us. She took so long in getting back to M about the dates he would have B for the Christmas break that we can no longer afford the plane tickets. They went up by almost $500. Her comment, she has no control over the airlines. How about you give us a timely answer since we have no control over the airlines.

This woman is such a piece of work. You can't say anything nice, she'll twist it; you can't do anything nice, she'll twist that too; you can't ask a question, you're changing the subject if you do that. I really don't know how she gets along in life. She thinks everything revolves around her. (one of the many reasons I refer to her as "Planet D").

She has ruined many vacations, she has ruined the relationship between B and M, she has ruined any hope of a relationship between me and B. She thrives on the negativity.

What's worse is that it is really getting to me. I don't want it to. I want to be happy. Most people say nice things about me, either they are telling lies or I'm a genuinely nice person. But dealing with the woman and her chaos is turning me into someone I don't want to be. I try to make the choice to not let it, but it is SO hard.

So, new commitment, focus on me! Focus on what makes me happy! If I am happy I will be able to make those around me happy. If I am frustrated and angry all the time I only make those around me frustrated and unhappy.

I make the commitment to (try) not to let D and her negativity get to me.

Lesson Plans

2009-10-29T11:23:00.000-07:00

I am tired of spending my entire prep period looking for ideas on what to teach. I have never taught this level before, have never read most of the literature and now spend most of my time stressing of how to make British Lit interesting for American teenagers.

My department chair is a wonderful woman and does a great job with seniors. But her style of teaching is very confusing to me. We meet on a fairly regular basis and I am still completely lost. It seems our meetings are always a week behind where I feel I am. Her lessons are very free flow, for example, the kids drew pictures of the characters in Canterbury Tales and then did resumes for them. I can see where this is a great lead in to doing their career research project and doing a resume, but it doesn't tell me what I should be teaching about the Canterbury Tales or Chaucer. I need more of an anchor.

So, I am pretty much giving up on Canterbury Tales and moving on to Beowulf. Although I have no ideas there either. I am again spending hours and hours of time researching what I should be teaching. I should have kept sophomores. At least there I had a clue, here I have no idea.

Are you kidding me...

2009-10-20T10:25:00.000-07:00

I have another cold. It seems like I just got over the last one. Damn little petre dishes.

Rehearsal

2009-10-16T08:29:00.000-07:00

My days are comprised of many, many rehearsals right now. I love rehearsal. I love the process of creating theatre. Creating a new world and bringing characters to live. Now, I just wish my students loved it as much as I do.

The problem I am encountering right now is that the actors (beginners, advanced and those in the play) don't want to do their "actor" homework. The work where they sit down with their scripts and dig for the gold that creates an interesting, well rounded character. They think that acting is about words, not about life.

It has gotten worse year after year. It is so bad this year that when I was talking to a group of beginning students and was explaining the concept of "being in the moment" of a scene; the moment where the scene is real to the actors and the audience alike, two girls at in the back of the room and were making fun of what I was saying, rolling their eyes and you could tell they weren't buying it and thinking I was stupid. I actually used it as an example, saying that just because they didn't to believe it and sit and roll their eyes and think it's stupid, that the ones who take it seriously and do the work are going to be the ones who get the good grades and have the most fun in the class because acting isn't fun, unless you take it all the way. The got the hint and stopped their disrespectful and distracting behavior. We'll see how it goes today when they actually have to start staging their scenes.

I remember a time (boy, now do I feel old) when the students in a theatre class would actually try to make the scenes believable, would want to play improv games and have a good time. Ah, the good ol' days.

Listening (s)Kills

2009-10-14T08:31:00.000-07:00

How hard is it to listen to directions and then follow them? Apparently very!

I have explained the same assignment for two days in my theatre 1 class and still the students do not understand what they are supposed to be doing, what subtext is or what blocking is. I have explained all 3 multiple times and even tried to deal with them...no written terms test if they can demonstrate they understand the terms by using them in discussion and applying them in class.

Right now you would think I said "This class is devoted to talking to your friends and me giving assignments that don't mean anything."

Oh, and get this, I have been asked by one little darling when we will start doing "Real Acting". I can't wait until this kids gets a 5 minute scene and can't figure out how to prepare because he blew off everything up to that point.

Note: I just gave the 10th private lesson on what subtext is.

I love my job, I love my job, I love my job, I love my job.....

Dysfunction...

2009-10-12T10:02:00.000-07:00

Let me start by saying I love my job. I love my school. I love my kids. I love my coworkers. I love my administration.

Now, let me tell you what I don't love. The dysfunction that is prevailing on my campus. The administrators don't communicate with each other. Three of them don't like one of them, that one doesn't like the others. There is tons of resentment and anger all over our campus for various things, many of which occured before I started 6 years ago. Yes, resentment that is 6 years old.

As the staff club president I feel like it is my job to do something to improve the moral. I know that I can't take then entire burden on myself, but something has to be done. I don't understand why those who aren't happy don't just leave. Why stay someplace you don't like, working with people you don't like. It just doesn't make sense.

Because this does bother me so much, I vow to continue to be a positive force on campus. To continue my attempts at improving moral and making this a great place to work. I also vow to not take it personally when people won't jump on my band wagon, but continue to invite them aboard.

Egg Shells

2009-09-30T10:39:00.001-07:00

That is what I feel like I am walking on at all time. I no longer feel comfortable in my own home. I have two step-daughters, neither of which are real fond of me. One I at least get along with. They both seem to look down on me because I am not of the same religion, which really pisses me off.

I am at my wits end and am considering something drastic (and expensive). It's not a road I want to take, but I also want to be happy.

Bunnies....

2009-09-29T10:17:00.001-07:00

Our campus is loaded with bunnies. Cute, furry, little bunnies. They are wonderful to watch as they frolic and play.

They also dig holes in our football field. I have heard stories of the the coaches telling the kids they will get rewarded for each bunny the catch. But what do they do with them? I'm sure it isn't something I really want to know.

One kid told me today that the football coach said he was going to let them bring their bb guns to school to shoot the bunnies. I told the kid I would report them to the SPCA for animal cruelty.

I understand that this is a problem. But just because someone is too lazy to figure out an alternative solution does not mean death is the only option.

I have made this my cause this year. I am determined to find a rescue group who will help to a catch and release program. That way we can manage our rabbit population without doing harm to the animals.

The College Fund

2009-09-23T08:08:00.000-07:00

My SD-19 is now living with us. It's been a huge struggle for me to have a full time teen living in the house. She is planning on becoming an ultrasound tech, which is very cool and a good career move.

Here is the problem, she waited until the last minute to apply for any of her loans/grants. The financial guy at the school seems to think between Pell grants and Stafford loans we will only need to come up with $3000. Which is great! Except, we don't have that money and I'm concerned that the almost $300 a month payment is going to be put undue strain on us. I say undue because there is a college fund. A college fund that M doesn't want to use, he would rather hold on to it and give it to SD to use as a nest-egg for a house.

Now, here is my confusion, WHY if you have a college fund would you take on that kind of stress. If it is a house fund, why call it a college fund. M then told me that it is in reality the "L-fund". I about flipped a gasket. I have NEVER heard of doing something like this. Just giving a kid that kind of money, just because (okay, maybe in wealthier families, but not at our standard of living).

M seems upset at me because I don't want to take on the extra debt. I'm upset because I feel my entire life is being put on hold because of money because of what we (meaning he) wants to do with and for the girls. We had started to talk about having a baby (ssshhh, you are the first ones to know that), can't afford a baby because we have a 19-year-0ld living in the house that we have to pay for, and a 14-year-0ld who hates me. Can't afford to take the trips I want because we are so far in debt right now and the only trips M can figure into his mind are big trips with the girls. And apparently we can't go without doing some sort of big trip with them each year.

I am beginning to resent the girls because I am not able to do the things I want to do because he is always putting them first (don't event let me started on pictures, that is a whole other story).
I really don't want to be "this" person, but what I am to do, muffle how I feel, let all the expendable money we happen to get go to things for the girls and let my feelings of resentment get worse?

From what I have heard this is a common feeling among step-parents. Especially when the birth parent puts all their focus on the kids and not on the relationship. I am feeling so stressed that it is starting to affect the relationship I was trying to develop with L.

And to make my feelings worse, M brought up what are we doing to do in 4 years when SD-14 hits college and it could cost $10,000 a year. I said use her college fund and cross that bridge when we get closer to it.

sad news...

2009-07-23T07:40:00.001-07:00

I just got an email from one of my parents (school parents), whom I also consider a good friend, she just found out that her husband has 3-6 months to live. He has been battling esophageal cancer for several years. It had gone into remission, but in the last year had come back and wasn't responding to treatment.

Please keep N and D in your thoughts and prayers.

Chuggin' Along...

2009-07-09T12:46:00.001-07:00

Summer is moving at break neck speed for me and I don't feel like I'm getting enough done. I feel like I spend all my time cleaning, this is due to the fact the new 19y/o living in the house does even less than her father when it comes to helping out. To add to the chaos, 8 of her friends from Utah are coming to town tomorrow afternoon, for a week. And last night I was told I was wrong because I was upset that the ballroom dancing night AT THE HOUSE wasn't run by me first. I was told it is her house too. Fine, then maybe she should do some stuff around here. Now, would I have said no, probably not, but it would have been nice to have been part of the conversation that said it was okay.

The rest of what is going on and how I am feeling about it is a long, long, long story and makes me very, very, very upset, so I shall not talk about it and update the to do list...

1. Scan family photos - haven't started this

2. Scan heritage photos - haven't started

3. Paint iron patio furniture - thought about starting

4. Landscape the tranquility garden - did work on this for a couple of hours a couple of days ago

5. Read - I continue to read as much and as quick as I can.

6 Funding - Got an email from an organization that has two grants that I might qualify for, of course they have already given them out for the coming year. I can apply in March. I need to call Rotary Club again, they never called me back.

7. AVON WALK - I need to raise $1000 still in order to do the walk. Right now I am making spare change jars for people to collect their change in for donation. Now, I just have to get people to agree to fill the jars.

Okay, off and running. I need to clean a doggie pool so I can return it, the dogs want nothing to do with it.

dropped off

2009-07-02T07:14:00.000-07:00

School let out and summer vacation started and I dropped off the face of the earth. I have been enjoying my time off. Reading, working around the house and visiting with friends. It hit me yesterday that I only have 5-6 weeks left. It is going by super fast, mainly because summer is almost 2 weeks shorter this year. Our district in an effort to save money has eliminated our year round track for elementary schools. To keep those parents happy they adjusted the traditional track schools to have a longer winter break and a longer spring break. I'm not so sure about the change, but I'm willing to give it a shot with an open mind.

So, with my remaining weeks I have a lot of stuff I want/need to get done, with that here are a "To Do" list.

1. Scan family photos - several years ago I became the self professed family historian. That basically means I stared scanning 30-some-odd years of family photos and moving them to acid free albums. I never finished, so that needs to get done.

2. Scan heritage photos - on the same lines of the family photos, I have 3 albums that belong to my grandmother that I need to scan.

3. Paint iron patio furniture - when R passed away 3 years ago I took some really cool patio furniture from his house. I have never gotten around to painting it, although I did buy the paint. I want to paint the furniture and make it functional.

4. Landscape the tranquility garden - okay it's really not a tranquility garden, it's just the garden on one side of our backyard, but I want to make it a place where we can relax and enjoy the evenings with some tea or a glass of wine.

5. Read - the reading list for the summer is HUGE. I am changing English levels next year and haven't read most of the stuff on the reading list, so I have some catch up to do. Not to mention I need to find my fall play.

6 Funding - I need to find funding for my online class. The school informed me at the end of last year that they will not fund me next year. I don't get it, we are one of 18 schools in the world that do this project and they don't want to fund it.

These are some of the major things, there are lots of other little projects that keep popping up. The paper to do list is much longer, because I add to it as I discover things that need to be done. I also want to make a trip to Phoenix to visit my grandmother and and possibly to Colorado to see my sister (this is the trip M wants me to make).

In the middle of all of this I want to find some beach time, I'm looking a little pasty right now.

So, what are your summer plans? Anything exciting going on?

Only

2009-06-10T08:08:00.000-07:00

DAYS LEFT!!!!

The weather here continues to be June Gloom. I'm tired of overcast, chilly weather. If it's going to look like this I want rain (rumor has it an El Nino is headed our way).

School continues to move along and is proving to be a big disappointment for next year. I recently found out that one of the projects I do with my students will not be funded. The cost is relatively minimal, but the school says they can no longer pay for it. If I find my own funding I think I can still do it, so I am on the search for a group or several groups who will help me continue to participate in this project. I will tell you more about it once I know if I can find the funding (lest someone try to steal the project out from under me, I mean, come on, I'm one of 18 schools that get the opportunity to do this).

The students get more and more out of control each day. Today I am administering a district final with my English students and I would say at least half of them did not bring pencils. Who doesn't bring a pencil to a final? I really could throttle them, but it's against the law.

Things at home do not seem to be improving. L has moved in, which is going okay, we are all working on making the adjustments. I don't think she likes the fact that I don't just let her do what she wants. I'm sorry, I think going to the spa with a boy she knows likes her (and I know wants to get into her pants) at 10:00 pm is a good idea, even if she explained that she will only be his friend. If there was going to be a group that would have been different.

B continues to be a thorn in my side. I think D is beginning to realize that maybe I'm not the complete and total problem. M is doing a better job at standing up for me to her. The issue this time is that I hurt her feelings because I teased her about braces not hurting as bad as she makes it out to be whenever she gets them tightened. She won't even talk to me on those days. Oh she can talk to everyone else, but not to me, it hurts to bad. So this last time I called her on it. I wore braces, I know what it feels like. When D expressed concern about what I might say when I see B again M told her that my take on it is to treat her the same way I treat my students (I only tease the ones I like) and they all seem to be okay with it. And he explained that when we are together at the house I usually go into the craft room or play on my computer, that B and I say very little to each other and he only sees that as getting worse now. D couldn't say anything to that.

I could go on and on about the situation there. But let me leave it at this, I don't hate B, I hate her behavior. I know for a fact she hates me because she has told people that. (M called her on that one, finally). It's going to be a fun filled summer, I can feel it.

Now, off to grade some more papers...

Today's programing is brought to you by the number...

2009-06-02T15:24:00.001-07:00

Because that is how many days I have left of school.

The days are moving by at break neck speed, so much to do and so little time. I have lists and lists of things to accomplish and I don't think there are enough days to get it done. Not to mention I can feel myself getting overwhelmed and when that happens I mentally shut down and don't get anything done.

Here is a list of things that make the end of this year especially nice:

1. I won't have to deal with the group of senior boys that have been terrorizing my theatre 1 class all year.
2. I will have a second theatre 1 class next year.
3. The theatre will be completely, spotlessly clean before I leave for the summer.
4. I may not have to teach sophomore English next year (I might have seniors).
5. I'm ready for a fresh start.

Here is a list of things that make the end of this year a little sad:

1. I am losing two of my favorite students EVER! (there are a at least 4 other students in my 13 years that I feel this way about, so that says a lot about these kids).
2. One of my favorite kids doesn't like our department or school anymore and wants to go live with her dad. It's killing her mom's spirit, I feel for her. I consider the mom a good friend.
3. I don't know what my fall play is going to be.

What's keeping me going right now is the fun of completely cleaning my theatre. The head custodian got me a big dumpster and we are throwing stuff out right and left. The hard part is never knowing what you might need. But I can only store so much. I will take pictures tomorrow for your viewing pleasure. I really wish I had thought of that before I started cleaning out our storage bin. But better late than never. I am so excited to rummage through the bins and bins of costumes that were found, decide what is worthwhile and what is trash. I am looking forward to photo cataloguing all the major furniture pieces and unique prop items that way when we have a show we can shop effectively "in-house". And I am looking forward to being able to move around the theatre without having to constantly move things out of my way. Wait until you see all my "junk". I know several of you might break out in hives with the mess and clutter that you will witness.

And with that, I am tired of being at school. I am going to pack up my papers to grade and do that at home with a nice glass of ice water.

only...

2009-05-29T08:00:00.000-07:00

13 days to go!

The kids are getting antsy, I'm getting tired and everyone is getting lazy. I can't wait until we're done.

Aside from that my life is running a break neck speed as always.

Here are a few lists and then I'm off to grade papers while my students silent read for a bit.

Things I am trying to do
1. Plan a family summer vacation. If only the "ex" would give us the dates that B will be with us. I am pretty sure she withhold's this information so she can maintain control over M's life. I mean he divorced her, she doesn't have the ultimate power any more, she has to do something to control his life.
2. Plan a trip to New Mexico in August for a wedding
3. Find a job so we won't go bankrupt over the summer.
4. Schedule dog training for the pups.
5. Get caught up on grading papers before school lets out.

Places I want to try visit this summer
1. Phoenix - to see my grandmother again
2. New Mexico - for a wedding
3. Carpenteria State Beach - for some relaxation

Projects I want to complete this summer
1. Finish scanning the 30-some-odd years of family photos and get them back to my mom's house.
2. Scan the historical photo albums I borrowed years ago from my grandmother so she can have them back.
3. Get my "secret" garden back in shape. It's not really a secret, but that's the feeling I want to create.
4. Finish the quilt my grandmother gave me to the topper to.
5. Make a baby afghan for my cousin who is going to have a baby.

Things I want to add to my bucket list
1. An African Safari
2. Go down in a shark cage
3. Act in a professional production of something

And now I am off...got to run, got to teach, got to try and mold the youth of today into the production adults of tomorrow we hope they will be.

Count Down...

2009-05-15T16:16:00.000-07:00

more days of students!

Parents don't fool yourselves, teachers look forward to summer vacation just as much as your kids do. It's not that we don't love our jobs or love the kids, it is the shear fact that they wear us down by June.

I for one have several I would love to give a swift kick in the pants as they leave me for parts unknown. But, then there are the ones who I love and care for as if they were my own. They are ones that make it all worth it.

Like JC, who has been in my program for 4 years, worked long, tireless hours for me and has made every attempt to make my life in this job easier.

And JD who in her sweet (yet sometimes neurotic) ways always makes me smile. I have taken this one in under my wing and have vowed to make sure she is okay no matter what. She has a rough home life (no abuse, just a case of local poverty going on here). At one point M and I were days away from seeing what paperwork would be involved for me to have living with us.

And little AR, she isn't as active as I would like, but she is a joy to have around and always has a smile for everyone.

And sweet, sweet CV, who came in to my theatrical life just last year and took the department and my heart by storm. She is a tiny dynamo of talent and is going to blow everyone away as she goes off to college to pursue an career in musical theatre.

And AM, my highly motivated, highly talented techie girl. I don't know how 90% of the set work is going to get accomplished next year without her. She would do anything to create an awesome set (including painting 3 ginormous canvas backdrops).

As happy as I am for this group to be graduating, I am going to miss this bunch immensely. They are my hope for the future, my sanity, my students...

My kids.

Why do rules change?

2009-05-07T09:41:00.000-07:00

I often wonder about this. I have worked at my school for 5 years and in the district for 10, and the rules are constantly changing. I understand the concept that sometimes rules need to change, but don't tell me that something has always been a rule when I have never been asked to do it.

I have run into this situation numerous times this year. All regarding paperwork. This year I have been told I am supposed to submit my show posters, program and tickets for approval because they are seen by the public. I have to submit my insurance to drive students (which I actually knew but haven't done in years, and have continued to drive students with the administration's knowledge).

I am compulsive rule follower, I like to follow rules, I like structure. But don't tell me things have always been a certain way when they haven't. Don't treat me like the scum of the earth and scold and reprimand when you haven't enforced the rules that have been broken. Don't be reactive, be proactive. It is actually to the point of being ridiculous.

I lost it...

2009-03-05T19:45:00.000-08:00

Today after rehearsal I was looking for my microphone and cable for tomorrow's performance. Couldn't find it, anywhere, I have been looking on and off for a few weeks. Today I also discovered that two ginormous projection screens that were donated to me are missing. Top that off with a 3 page "to do" list and I flipped.

I threw keys (not at anyone), yelled and stormed around. It was bad, and I calmed down in a matter of 20 minutes. I feel bad about it. I don't like when it happens. I have sent apologies to several of the students who had to experience it, and will catch the rest tomorrow. I don't like to blow up, especially in front of the kids. I hope the aftermath is not too bad. Once again, this is not the person I want to be. I want to be calm and supportive and together. Not the nutjob who freaks out at the drop of a hat.

Now, to help relieve some of that stress I shall now kill some zombie's.

striving for mediocrity

2009-02-24T09:18:00.000-08:00

Today it was announced on the news that California is 48th in education. How pathetic is that?

The government has slashed educational spending by billions of dollars. Our district has to cut 40 million from the budget before 2011. I know that 10 is being cut from the year that has already started (yep, money that has already been spent must now be unspent) and another 10 from next year. And that doesn't even add up to the total cuts that need to be made.

Now, keep in mind that with all these cuts as a teacher I am expect to still do the following:

- provide varied educational experiences (this is educational speak for fieldtrips, which we can't go on because there is no money)
- use technology (there isn't any money to update technology, so we better hope nothing changes)
- give each student a book (let's hope they don't destroy the books, because there isn't any money to replace them)
- give students one-on-one differentiated instruction (this means, design lessons that meet each individual students needs, meanwhile the classes can have 40 or more students in them)
- provide for students who do not speak English, do not have money for supplies yet have a nicer cell phone than I do.
- manage classes full of kids who don't want to be there and don't care if they pass.
- fill out paperwork for students in special needs programs
- attend IEP meetings for those special needs students

All this while maintaining a positive attitude and smile. It's not wonder California is having a hard time recruiting high quality teachers. We are some of the lowest paid in the country (in relation to our cost of living). And the respect teachers get...oy! Athletes get more respect and most of them are criminals (just look at Michael Vick and his cohorts), these are the people teens look up to. If a kids is smart or wants to learn they are made fun of and ridiculed. It isn't cool to want to be involved with anything or be successful.

We live in a time of entitlement. A time where people expect to just "get". People don't think they have to work for anything. I blame this on the parents (not all parents, I know some who are teaching fabulous values and responsibility and I respect these people more than words can express). Parents who expect teachers to just give students an "A" for being in class not for doing quality work (quality doesn't matter). I actually had a parent tell me once that her child deserved an "A" in my class because he tried. Last time I checked trying isn't always doing. Needless to say that parent had her son removed from my English class. Then there is the parent who was just happy I have her son a ton of extra help and he was pulling a "C". (both these students were special ed, mainstreamed).

Wow, that is quite the rant...and all I really wanted to say is that at this point the state of California is just striving for mediocrity and I'm not sure we are reaching it.

It's a dog's life...

2009-02-12T11:48:00.000-08:00

Check out this new Puppy Store on Melrose...

pretty swanky huh?

Here is the catch, this store has dogs that have been rescued from Death Row in Los Angeles animal shelters.

When I was first sent the link I was furious. I don't like the idea of dogs being sold in stores, especially when so many of them come from puppy mills and other horrible breading conditions. And then I read their press release, I almost jumped out of my chair with a big "YES!!!" for those poor shelter dogs.

The Los Angeles Animal Care Centers have over 300 dogs in their 6 facilities. They will keep the dogs as long as they can, weeks or months, as long as room holds out, for these dogs to find their forever homes. And now with this pet store taking dogs off of death row and giving them a second chance...WOW, those are some lucky pups.

If you are looking for a dog (or cat) please consider adopting rather than buying from a pet store (unless it's OrangeBone Puppy Store) or breeder. There are so many adoptable animals just waiting for their forever homes, could it be with you?

Crap Storm

2009-02-10T05:30:00.000-08:00

That's what I feel like I'm in, a huge crap storm. It seems like no matter what I do bad things happen to me. I keep being told that things will turn around, but right now it feels like if it wasn't for bad luck I wouldn't have any luck at all.

Here is the list of all that is bad:

1. The wind storm in January blew down the courtyard fence at the townhouse and did extensive damage to the back fence. The quote from the insurance company to get it fixed was less than 1/2 of the quote we got and would have gotten us $1.50 back on the claim. Told them to forget it.

2. B is being a little B. She this is still from the last big fall out. She says M isn't there for her, she told one of my students she doesn't like me (so, when/if M has visitation I don't go and if they come here I lock myself in my craftroom). Yet, she is still willing to ask him to do her favors like provide lights for her school dance, but doesn't know when she wants to talk to him next.

3. District budget cuts are putting my program in jeopardy. And they are talking about doing salary cuts.

4. I have to get a second job for us to pay our bills this summer, because of all the bad stuff that has happened in the past several months there is no savings.

5. I have been told I have to stay on our School Site Council although I have asked to leave it. I just don't have the time. Other things are suffering because of the commitment to this. I just stopped showing up to meetings.

6. My principal thinks I am the "Go To" gal because I am president of the staff club. I only continue to do that because I can't find someone else to take it over. I really don't want it.

Okay, I think that's enough, I'm getting stressed and upset just looking at that stuff. Which is surprising because normally I put it on "paper" and things don't seem so bad. They still seem bad, in fact, now they seem worse.

I hope everyone has a good day and that the crap storm lifts soon.

Grades, grades, grades...

2009-01-23T10:30:00.000-08:00

That is what I'm dealing with. Grading tons and tons of papers (yes, I put many off to the last minute, but believe me when I say I grade papers every day).

Final grades are due on Wednesday, so all papers must be graded, all performances must be complete and we begin a new slate.

My advanced theatre students have managed to put off reading the plays they are required to read until the last minute so I am giving them until Monday to do their play reports. If they had done them over the entire semester it would have been a play every two weeks. That's not bad. But NO! I have students coming up to me wanting more time, wanting me to give them extra credit for things that don't warrant extra credit. They tell me 10 plays in a semester are too many. They have lost their minds. Drama students should want to read plays.

Ah, the joys of being a teacher!

When...

2009-01-22T12:48:00.000-08:00

did it become acceptable to question a teacher on their grading policy in front of the entire class?

I have a student in my theatre 1 class who questions every grade he gets. And not along the lines of logic. He feels he works hard, I see him doing nothing. He seems to think that running his lines with his scene partner over the phone should somehow count as class participation. He doesn't understand that just because you work on something doesn't necessarily make it "A" work. I really have to hold back when he starts to do this. I actually start to argue back. I used to laugh at my friend who had this sae kid two years ago about arguing with him, it hard not to. He sucks you in.

My department is dependent on numbers. I have to have the kids in the class to make the class happen. I actually would pay money to make this kid go away. Kind of sucks, I hate feeling this way about my kids.

And on the note of when did things become acceptable...when did it become acceptable to waste classtime and then ask the teacher for an extra day to turn in an assignment? I can't count the number of sophomores who have asked me that today.

drama in the drama department

2009-01-21T16:59:00.000-08:00

It seems the curse of the scottish play has struck my theatre department. In the last hour I have had two kids quit the show, come back, gave a lecture on them needing to suck it up and deal because we open next week, one quit again and was talked back in by his friend, and then he told me he would do the show but wasn't going to talk to anybody in the cast. ARGH!

In all honesty I don't know how these kids are going to survive when they go out into the real world. I have one girl who hasn't smiled in two days and looks like she is in some kind of coma-state because the boy who is/was her best friend and her got into a fight. Neither one of them thinks they did anything wrong, neither one is willing to be the bigger person and talk to the other about what is bother them. The boy is just letting it roll off him and doing what needs to get done, the girl has completely shut down.

I love working with teens. This is the worst part of my job (right up there with casting a show). I want to make things better for them, but need to realize that I can't fix everything. I try not to let it get to me, but these kids are so important to me, some of them don't have any other strong, stable adult figure in their lives. I don't feel like I can just cut that connection.

Then I have the one who thinks she is more of an adult than her 17 years really allow her. She only sees things in black and white and refuses to even consider that there are gray areas. She in some ways makes things worse by perpetuating the "hatred" and anger that some of the kids feel toward one student in particular. This student is going through some serious growing pains, he says he hates everyone who used to be his best friends. He has been mean to some of them, treated them poorly, but it seems to me more like a cry for help than anything. He has recently gotten out of a very destructive relationship (for both parties, good kids, not good together). The kids who were his friends are siding with the girl because they say he was mean to her. Even as he tries to repair these relationships, they won't let him. They don't view it as him crying for help, they just see it has him being an ass.

All of this is going on in my cast of 13. The only ones not in turmoil are the ones who refuse to let it get to them. I am trying to be in that group. One of my motos this year is "Water off a Duck's Back". Although, right now, SUCK IT UP! seems to be more appropriate.

and he huffed and he puffed and...

2009-01-13T06:34:00.000-08:00

he blew the fence down. Yep that's right, the fence at the townhouse is down!

I got a call from M at about 5:15 this morning, he was on his way to San Diego for work and got the call from our tenant that the courtyard fence was down. Now, I knew it needed to be replaced, but I was hoping to get a little more on top of the bills before we had to do it. (I'm holding my breath that the back yard fence holds for this windy season and we can buy a little time on that one). Both fences really should have been replaced when I was living on the property, but I didn't have the money then, kind of like now.

I have emailed the association to let them know we are aware of the situation and see how long we have to fix it. I have emailed all the neighbors (that I have contacts for) told them we know about the situation and that we are working on it. I'm not so worried about the assoication, it's the neighbors. They don't like my tenant. He was a little loud when he moved in. He refused to meet them because they didn't come over and welcome him to the neighborhood. But that is another story.

So, now I am on the search for a good contactor (good and cheap). If you know one in the OC (that's Orange County, CA) please let me know. I have a fence to replace.

Note: I will be posting pictures tonight of the damage. I figure we might want to take pictures just in case. Hopefully the tenant hasn't removed the debris before I get there.

WHOLEY CRAP!!!

2008-12-29T12:06:00.000-08:00

I finally sat down to back up all my pictures on my desktop. I've been putting it off for 5 years. So, there are 5 years of pictures plus scans of family pictures for the last 30 some-odd years. I leave the room for 15 minutes, come back and the computer has frozen. No big deal it does it frequently. One of the reasons I was backing up today, so I could start taking pictures off the hard drive. Do my usual to reboot....now there is a problem. All I get is the Compaq red screen and a high pitched beep. I don't know if this is a crash or what, all I know is it isn't good.

My sister says to unplug and walk away for a while. I am trying not to meltdown about it. My dear, dear husband says he will look at it when he gets home from Costco. The man is sweet, but knows nothing about PCs. I am tempted to just call the Geek Squad.

Someone, just please tell me that my photos will be saved. There is a lot of other important stuff on there, the only thing I care about are the photos. JUST SAVE THE PHOTOS!!!!!

oh my heck...melt down ahead

2008-12-18T12:35:00.000-08:00

A student approached me and asked what was wrong...I about took off his head. I'm having a melt down. It dawned on me today that people think that I have 6 hours in the day that they don't. That has got to be the only explaination as to why people keep asking me to do things.

In the next two days I must complete the following:

1. come up with certificate categories for the annual gingerbread house contest (more on that in another post)
2. finish the afgan I'm making for my grandmother
3. decorate for the staff holiday breakfast
4. pick up one more secret santa gift
5. add something to my best work friend's gift
6. create a book report type activity for my sophomores
7. grade 3 months worth of English papers

In the next 4 days I must:

1. make 4 photo albums (two that must ship)
2. ship the 3 gifts that need to be shipped (see above)
3. send out the holiday newsletter or Christmas cards
4. make sure M writes the holiday newsletter

In the next week I must:

1. shampoo the carpet in my house
2. clean the craft room
3. make 2 gifts
4. finish buying stocking gifts
5. paint the entryway
6. do backyard recon from the puppy destruction
7. menu plan for Christmas Eve
8. clean for the family party on Christmas Eve
9. take the puppies to the groomers

So, needless to say, I'm just a tad busy.

feeling a little grinchy

2008-12-17T07:37:00.001-08:00

I am just not feeling the Christmas spirit. B and D have done it again. This is two years in a row (actually it's been going on for 6 years) that they have made the holiday season miserable. B has decided she doesn't want to go to my families Christmas party. M asked her if she was still coming on Christmas Eve since my family was going to be there, she at first said I don't know, but when he told her that if she was wanting to cut them out of her life he would tell them to return the gifts they bought her. That changed her tune, all of sudden she didn't want to cut them out, she would be there Christmas Eve. Of course now I don't want her there.

My family is trying so hard to make her feel like part of the family and comfortable and welcome and all she can do is spit in their faces. I am so tired of trying to foster some sort of relationship with her. I just want to call it quits and be done with it. I know doing that would upset M, but right now I don't care. I hate to say it but this nonsense maybe be the death of a great relationship.

I don't want it to effect my relationship with M, but when he is so miserable because B doesn't want to come around, doesn't want to be an active part of our family (we are like Disneyland to her, she comes, we plan something and spend money on her and she goes away to her "real" home). I just feel like his relationship with her would be so much better if I just wasn't around. I know that between now and Christmas anytime he has B, I plan on being someplace else. It will just be better that way, I am in a state of mind regarding her that I might just say something I would regret later.

Has anyone else gone through this? Does it ever get better? Easier?

On a brighter note...L is arriving the day after Christmas. That should be fun, that's the step-daughter I get along with. A couple of days after she arrives her best friend is coming. I'm excited, I have planned a few things for me and the 18-year-olds. I think we will have a good time, and as mean as it sounds I'm not taking B with us.

Just another day in paradise?

2008-12-15T08:49:00.000-08:00

I have returned from a fabulous trip to New York. I learned a lot, saw some great theatre and had the opportunity to reconnect with great friends. The weather was cold, it rained for two days and the city was crowded beyond belief. But man did we have fun.

This morning I am back at work, dealing with teenagers. I have already yelled at both my English classes. They don't seem to understand that when asked to please stop talking, it doesn't mean to finish your conversation and then stop. Theatre 1 complained very vigorously about how hard the new scenes are going to be and said they took a vote to use scripts of the same level of the last ones. I had to explain that it wasn't a democracy, they were living in my queendom for period 3. Looking forward to advanced students who will want to know all about the trip to New York.

On a very happy note...I forgot today is a minimum day. I only have to deal with students until 12:15 today. Although, I do have a cast meeting, department meetings and rehearsal this afternon. It is better than teaching until 3:00.

a heart breaking moment

2008-12-08T09:30:00.001-08:00

I had to take a day to ponder on this otherwise this post would be very angry and even more hurtful.

It has all hit the fan again with B after we thought things were getting better. Yesterday we were supposed to go hear her sing at her church and see a display of nativity scenes. I was really looking forward to going, I like nativity scenes, I like listening to choirs sing and it was the first time I was going to attend an event for B (even though her dad and I have been together for years).

M talked to B on Sunday afternoon and discovered that BB (birth b#@#$) was going to be holding a seat for him with her family. He reminded B that I was coming and that she should let her mom know. B gave the phone to her mom, who when told I was coming said "No". From there it turned really, really bad. BB hung up on M, he called back to talk to B but had to leave a message, B called him back after a few minutes.

At this point he asked B if she wanted me to go or not. The only way I wasn't going to go was if she said she didn't want me to. She said she didn't want me to, it would cause trouble. M asked about trouble for who, she said just trouble, so he decided he wouldn't go either. She then proceeded to tell him that her and her mom needed their space, that he wasn't there for her when he and her mom were together and he isn't there for her now. He stressed to her how he is always trying to get extra time with her and that her mom doesn't let him. (she makes sure he only gets the minimum of 6 hours the divorce papers say)

M ended up going but not sitting with BB and her family and he did not stay when it was over. He said B looked on the verge of tears the entire time. He is so finished with all of this. He goes out of his way to do things for B. He went and did lighting for one of her school dances, he is lined up to do 4 more dances for her thoughout the year (she's part of leadership). This means he is pulling out favors from people at this office to borrow equipment to make what B wants happen. This is the dad who "isn't there for her."

I was even dragged into the meat of the argument, apparently I disrespect her everytime I go to her house with M to pick up B. I never get out of the car, I don't even look at her if I can help it. She says she gets dirty looks whenever she drops off or picks up B from us. I don't even see her, she refuses to get out of the car.

I am at my wits end. I try to be supportive, I try to be understanding. But this CHILD treats her father like he's dirt anytime she doesn't get what she wants and I can't take it anymore! And don't know what to do. ARGH!!!

If only...

2008-12-04T09:26:00.000-08:00

I could kill sophomores without any legal reporcussions. Because I can name almost 40 who deserve to die right now.

I have never encountered a group who can go from being good kids to wholey terrors in 30 seconds. They don't listen, they don't work and try to take a sub's word over my own. If they would stop their side conversations long enough they would know and understand what we are doing, my throat wouldn't hurt from having to talk over them to get their attention and I wouldn't feel like I'm about to snap at any moment.

Oh, and to all you substitue teachers out there, don't augment my lesson plans, no matter how weak you feel they are. I don't want to grade the stupid crossword puzzle that you gave them because you thought it would be fun. Don't correct my theatre students when they know what they are doing because they have been doing it for a week.

All these things combined does not leave me feeling well about leaving them for 3 days next week while I'm at a conference. This should be fun. I really should check and see which sub is in my room....hopefully it is the retired marine, he ROCKS!!!!!

Poor Buddy

2008-12-03T15:12:00.001-08:00

On Monday the poor baby had to go the the doggie emergency room. He had a lot of vomiting and needed to be seen on the quick. After lots of time and lots of money it was determined that he needed x-rays and barium to figure out if there a blockage of somekind.

By 10:30 the next day it and two vets later it was determined that the problem could have been scraps from the molding he ate. But nobody will commit for sure. He was given some drugs and a bland diet and seems to be feeling fine as of 7:00 this morning when I left for work.

It should be noted that the picture actually has nothing to do with the incident in question, it is a photo of the poor boy covered in double stick tape. Since he can climb out of the indoor dog-run it was suggested that we line it with double stick tape since they don't like the way it feels. Well, apparently he tried to climb over, got covered in tape, ran outside rolled in the dirt to get the tape off, then came back in covered in tape and dirt and climbed out of the run.

Crazy puppy.

It's been a long time...

2008-11-26T13:02:00.001-08:00

since I last posted. My home Dell doesn't think the cookies are turned on so I can't post from it (until today that is, it seems to be okay with blogger today). My old Compac makes M mad when I use it because I have the new Dell. My work Dell, well it's at work and I'm just way too busy there.

Well, I will just skip to the chase...The play was fab, the kids were great, I'm already rehearsing the next show and selecting the one after that.

We are now on Thanksgiving break and boy do I need it!!!!!

The next 5 days will be filled with cleaning, decorating, family and friends. I am very excited.

To get the day really going a list of a few of the things I plan on getting done today...

1. Get my hair cut touched up, the back is just growing out too quickly
2. Go to the bank
3. Clean the house
4. Decorate for Christmas
5. Paint the entry way (the great room/kitchen got painted last year and I have just never finished the job)
6. Finish my Christmas shopping
7. Make a couple gifts for Christmas
8. Send out the E-vite for our Christmas Eve family party
9. Clean the craft room so I can get crafty
10. Send a gift that should have gone out MONTHS ago

The picture is of the puppies showing each other some puppy-love. I LOVE this picture.

question...

2008-11-04T06:38:00.000-08:00

Why is it that the Democrats can say what ever they want about the Republicans but heaven forbid a Republican say anything negative about a Democrat?

Remember to go out and get your vote on today! It's too important to let it slide.

Yummy!

2008-10-19T12:06:00.000-07:00

I have belonged to a website called Hungry Girl for about a year. The site is great, they send out emails with good food choices and nutritional states on things you may not think about looking up.
Today I decided to try one of the recipes that came in an email (motivated by the fact my sister gave me the Hungry Girl cookbook for my birthday).

Here is my review and the recipe....

Broccoli Cheese Soup

1 tray Green Giant just for one Broccoli and Cheese Sauce
1 wedge Laughing Cow original light swiss cheese
1/2 cup plain soy milk
salt and pepper to taste

Cook the broccoli and cheese according to the directions. Peel back the film and stir, adding in the laughing cow wedge (cut it up). Replace film and cook for another 45 seconds and stir. Allow to cool for a minute or two then put in the blender (I used my food processor) with the soy milk. Blend until you like it, reheat and enjoy.

I thought it was a little bland at first, but add some salt and pepper and it is way yummy. Especially if you are trying to watch the fat and calories, but LOVE broccoli cheese soup.

You can make this for as many as you want. I like the fact most HG recipes are for 1. M doesn't always like the same things I do when I am dieting, so it makes cooking a lot easier.

I hope you enjoy!

Hi Ho, Hi Ho...

2008-10-14T14:44:00.000-07:00

oh crap! Do you ever feel like you work and work and work and work and nothing seems to get done?

Welcome to my world.

I am to the point where I feel guilty if I do something for myself instead of for work. I can't see my desk and don't feel like I am serving my kids the way I should.

I would post a picture of my desk, but I am a bit embarrassed by the state of it.

Here are the 6 most important things on my to do list:
1. Get grades done
2. Prep my observation lesson (next Thursday)
3. Get the poster information for the fall play to the graphic design teacher
4. Call the costumer
5. Find a new restaurant for the faculty/staff to have dinner at before the homecoming game (my first choice has apparently gone out of business)
6. Finish updating my department goals and align them to the Content Standards (yes, theatre has content standards)

Good Grief...time to run to a meeting...will it never end?

Surprise!!!!!

2008-10-13T11:25:00.001-07:00

M threw a surprise birthday party for me on Saturday night. It was a lot of fun and really nice of him. I feel a little bad because I was mad at first, I had told him I didn't want a party. I knew something was up when I caught him making 3 tubs of sour cream dip.

My mom, K and I went shopping during the day and when we came home all the neighbors, friends and family were in the house. He went through a lot of trouble to make this a very special birthday and I really do appreciate it. I got over being mad really fast. I think one of the best parts was the fact that my cousin and her family changed their family vacation plans in order to make it to the party. They were planning on being in town earlier in the week, but when they found out about the party shifted things so they could come. I thought that was really nice of them.

I was impressed with who M was able to get to come. Since he doesn't really know my work friends he had the one he does know invite others, he asked my best drama teacher friend to invite anyone she could think of. It was great. And even though he said gifts not necessary, I was treated very well on this milestone of a day (I'm not telling so don't ask). Although, I think perhaps I might drink a little too much, I was given many, many bottles of wine and a bottle of vodka. I'm not sure if they are trying to tell me something. My coolest gift...a Cricut. Those of you in the scrapebooking world will know what that is. I now have my very own electronic die cut machine. It is way cool. I do feel a little guilty that M spent so much money on it. I better make good use of it.

I have a wonderful husband. B helped with the party and I was told by a couple of different people how sweet she was. She never talks to any of my friends or family when they are around her, so maybe we have hit a turning point. Maybe my not caring about it anymore (or at least not letting her know) is making a difference. Now that she can see that I'm not going to let it bother me. I hope this is a change that continues and we see lots of improvement because she has a whole new side of the family who would love to get to know her.

So, now I am one year older, hopefully a little bit wise and very very happy.

My Program is Imploding...

2008-10-06T07:51:00.000-07:00

I don't understand. I have a great group of kids, I am doing things they say they want to do, I am knocking myself out trying to make things great for them and still they insist on letting little things make them quit the program.

I don't know if it is becoming too incestuous and not enough new kids. I don't know if I'm putting too much pressure on certain kids or what. I have never seen this happen before in a theatre program and I am at a total loss as to what to do.

I love my job, I love my kids, I love theatre, but right now I am ready to give it all up and just teach English until I can find something else. Not really what I want to do, but it might be my only alternative to being miserable.

I am also going to not argue with kids who tell me they want to drop the class. I can't continue to fight with them. I think that is what they want, for me to beg them to stay. It's not going to happen. One of my best kids is trying to transfer. Before she came in I was told it was because she was mad about what happened on Friday in class while I was gone, when she came in she told me it was because she needed to work on other credits. I think she is lieing to my face, which pisses me off more than anything.

Somehow, since coming to this district I can't make a theatre program thrive, I did great at my last district and now, I am like the kiss of death for a program. It really is weighing heavy on me right now. I have some big decisions to make.

She's Amazing...

2008-09-27T10:02:00.000-07:00

My sister, K, has been overweight for almost as long as I can remember. She is a beautiful girl, but just always heavy, very heavy, which caused me to worry about her health and wellness. Nobody in the family ever really said anything to her about it, that would just be rude.

She had done several periods of time with WW and was very successful, but always gained it all back, plus some extra. I think the gain back was because her husband wasn't that supportive. I think he was threatened by her weightloss and feared she would leave him.

About a year ago, K, decided she had had enough of being fat (I'm not being mean, she was fat, and she knows it). She started on WW again and this time made a total life change commitment. At this point she has lost well over 100lbs, looks fabulous and just plain glows. She has incorporated so many changes in her life and has made exercise a real part of that life.

Her husband still isn't that supportive. He is definately proud of her and likes a lot of the changes he sees. But he keeps talking about being afraid that she won't be able to go back to "eating normal". Obviously what he considers normal wasn't working for her and made her overweight. He is upset that if they go out with friends she won't have a drink because she doesn't want to waist the "points", which is actually kind of funny because she has never really been a drinker and most of the times wouldn't have a drink anyway.

I am so proud of K for what she has accomplished, she is my inspriation (not to mention I was always the skinny one and now she is. Who ever said a little sisterly competition wasn't a good thing?). Because of her success I am not much more successful with my weight loss and getting fit.

And now, may I present the before and after pictures of my amazing sister. Enjoy and let her be your inspriation too, she's as beautiful on the outside as she has always been on the inside.

Before

After

Shin Splints Hurt

2008-09-25T11:52:00.000-07:00

A bunch. After the foot pain I got from the Avon walk as healed I am now dealing with shin splints that won't. Every time I think it's getting better, it doesn't. It really is messing up my workout routine. When I wake up with a swollen leg and pain I really don't want to go and work out. Even walking the dogs is hard right now.

I ice and ice and ice. I try to keep it elevated when I am home. But still I am in pain. I really don't want to go back to the doctor. I don't want to spend another $15 copay to hear that I have shin splints and need to ice it. I figure I will give it one more week. If it still hurts I will fork out the money.

On a lighter note...Rehearsals for the fall production are underway. The kids are excited, I'm excited and I think we are going to have an amazing show.

Fact or Fiction?

2008-09-19T09:32:00.000-07:00

I have been doing a lot of research on pit bulls. I have two pit bull mix puppies. I want to know everything I can about pit bulls and puppies and how to make sure my dogs are healthy, happy and safe. But of course now I am so confused...

There are so many differing opinions, keep the dogs apart, always! If they get along, let them play together but keep them apart when I'm gone. If they are about the same age and get along and I walk them together and feed them together they will be fine together when I'm are gone.

I don't know what to believe now.

I have several neighbors with multiple dogs and they tell me to just let the dogs be together. That they will be fine.

I have talked with a friend I consider to be somewhat of a pit bull expert and he says they should be fine because they are about the same age and get along very well.

I often consider knowledge to be power, but right now I'm thinking too much knowledge may not be a good thing.

I got the call...

2008-09-18T09:36:00.000-07:00

that nobody with a family member stationed over-seas ever wants to get.

My sister called today to tell me that MT was wounded. Fortunately, it is minor. His truck (or maybe Humvee) hit an IED (roadside bomb) and flipped. He broke his shoulder/clavicle thing and got some pretty good bumps and scrapes, but is going to be fine.

When S talked to him all he knew was he was being flown to the hospital in Germany. He will call later with details as to surgery and such.

The only other injury was the medic who was with them, he broke a vertebrae. He will also be fine. Everyone else was pretty banged up, but no fatalities.

Anyone who knows me well, knows I have an issue with the all powerful and don't go in for prayer, but for those of you who do, could you please pass some on to my sister and her family for piece while they wait to hear what is going on. And for MT that his injuries are really as minor as they say. AND for all of our men and women who are fighting a war that many don't agree with, but are still willing to give their lives for our freedoms and the privilege of saying you don't agree. (I love our soldiers!)

This, that and a whole lot of other...

2008-09-15T20:13:00.000-07:00

This post will be filled with all kind of apparently random stuff...I haven't been able to log in to blogger for several weeks. I have finally just decided to download Firefox and all seems to be working now (damn IE). So, here is the past month in a nutshell...

1. The puppy formally know as BJ is now known as Fender and is a playful happy member of the family. He and Bella get along famously. They play hard and love even harder. Everyday when I get home from work I get the puppy attack, it's a full frontal onslaught of of puppy tongue, which is always great fun.

He is still having some housetraining issues and does not like the fact he is crated every night, but we have to do it. Not to mention he tore a whole in one of the sofa pillows and we aren't sure if we are going to be able to replace it yet.

2. School is well underway. So far so good, I think. The drama kids are fun, like always. The sophomores are...well...sophomores. I think the worst sign is the that when we were in the library today having a booktalk with the library assistant to help the kids pick out books, a kid laughed at the book that was about a girl who gets raped and then finds out she has HIV. When I asked him why that was funny his response was that he didn't know, it was just funny. Kinda scarey.

3. Avon Walk for Breast Cancer was this weekend. Once again it was a great experience. I didn't make it the entire 39.3 miles, I have an inflamed tendon in my right foot and it hurts...bad. But I keep telling myself and everyone else who feels sorry me, it won't need chemo so it was all worth it.

4. Today we saw the first signs of aggression in Bella. As we went into the dog park she was going to say "hello" to another dog on lease outside, like we always do when she snarled and lunged toward the dog. We opted to take her in anyway, and before we could get Fender into the park she was nipping at another dog across the park. I had to run over, I felt so bad, fortunately the owner said everything was fine. She knows Bella, so I think she knows that that behavior is unusual for her. After that she was fine, even with the second dog that she nipped at. A little later there was the start of a fight between her and another dog. Another owner we know sort of took responsibility for that one. He said he was trying to get them to stop eating the grass/dirt when both dogs were heading for the same clump and they started. Turns out it the second dog of same owner. So, this poor woman, both her dogs with issues with Bella tonight. I felt so bad. I don't know what was up with Bella tonight and I hope we don't see it again. Nobody seemed really bothered by it, I think they all know Bella well enough and know that we keep her in pretty good check and that she is in reality a really big love bug. But I can tell you, I won't be taking both dogs by myself again any time soon, just in case. This is going to be a two human opperation.

Okay, I think that is most of the information I needed to get out. Like I said, I have been trying to post, Blogger issues abounded, but Firefox to the rescue.

what were we thinking...

2008-08-21T19:49:00.000-07:00

We were thinking that this face...

would end up in a shelter if we didn't take him in.

Meet BJ. He is a 4.5 month old pit bull mix who is now turning my life upside down. He isn't house broken, isn't crate trained, hasn't been neutered, growls at the cats, climbs out of the pen and is very much a PUPPY. Apparently he was an appartment dog who was allowed to run the house.

He is also a complete and total love bug. He likes to snuggle and give kisses and just love on his people.

He and Bella seem to get along pretty well. Although his little puppy teeth are tearing the crap out of her. He plays super rough, so much so I'm afraid of taking him to dog park.

BJ came to us because a friend of M's sent out an email about a friend of her's who needed to find a home for BJ because the appartment that allowed pets that they had lined up fell through. If they didn't find him a home he would be in a shelter. That thought just killed me because I know that in alot of shelters they don't up pit bulls up for adoption, they put them down, no matter what their disposition.

Right now as cute as he is and and sweet as he is I'm not sure I want to keep him, but I also don't want to see him go to a shelter. I feel bad because I either have to crate him and put Bella in her pen, or I have to nail a board over the dog door and put them both in the backyard when I leave for the day. He can't be left free in the house because he isn't house trained, not to mention we don't even leave Bella free in the house.

I'm also a little nervous about having two pit bulls. Although, I know that other people have done it. I guess that comes from the girl at the rescue we got Bella from scared the tar out of me when I asked her about getting a second one not long after we got Bella.

We want her to have a buddy for when I go back to work, but I don't want her lifestyle to completely change. I want her to still be able to come in during the day and lay in her bed. I want to feel like she isn't going to be hurt by another dog while I am gone at work.

I don't know what to do. I am so torn. If we give him back he goes to a shelter and I won't know what happens to him. I would love to find someone I know to take him because is going to be a great dog. But then again I have already started bonding with him and him with me.

Anyone have any advice or suggestions? I could use all the help I can get.

lack of focus...

2008-08-02T15:05:00.000-07:00

Have you ever had one of those days (weeks, months, years) where you just can't get your focus straight? I have a two page to do list to take care of before I leave for San Diego tomorrow.Most of the stuff has been on the list for a week and I can't seem to get my focus to get it done. I putter here, I putter there, but nothing is getting done. All I want to do is sit on the sofa and watch TV or sit in front of the computer and play games.

I'm not sure how to get back on track, but if I don't I'm up a creek without a paddle come Monday morning when I get to my conference.

Home again, home again...

2008-07-08T20:11:00.000-07:00

that's where I am. Vacation was, well, vacation. I really enjoyed the time spent with M's sister's family, they are great people. The time with the girls on the other hand, not so much. B managed to get out of going to the Canada portion of the "FAMILY" vacation by calling her mom and telling her she wanted to stay with her cousin. L managed to upset me by wasting money (M managed to do that as well). I'm sorry, but if someone else is paying your way don't sit on your but and do nothing because you're "hot" or "tired". But that is all fodder for another post in which I complain about nobody in this family being concerned with the difference between outflow and income (and it isn't going in the right direction).

I won't post all the details right now, I would much rather talk about what an amazing family M's sister has...Keep in mind I met K for the first time when she was only about 5 or 6. Seeing her with a family is actually a little strange.

K got pregnant when she as 16 and had C right before her senior year of high school. She managed to graduate, still taking AP and honors classes. When C was about 6 K married D. I actually had the privilege of attending the wedding. They are the coolest couple. K even wrote "wedding vows" for the kids to become brother and sister (D has a daughter about the same age as C). Since getting married they have had T and most recently baby P and D has legally adopted C. (It's beginning to look like alphabet soup here).

Being able to watch this family interact was so much fun. K is an amazing mom to these kids and has the patience of a saint. I don't know how she does it, there were times when I would have flipped my lid. Even more amazing is the fabulous relationship she has with D's daughter, E. As a stepmom I understand how hard that can be and K has it down. E even calls her mom.

K's family has completely embraced me as part of the family, which I know can be hard as the second wife. I felt so comfortable at their home (which is saying a lot, because I HATE to stay at other people's houses). I feel so lucky to have become part of this family. Not only to I have a fab husband (yeah, even though he makes me mad sometimes I still think he's pretty nifty), but I have an awesome extended family. I don't think I could as for more.

A bit of this, a bit of that and a little ARGH!!!

2008-06-22T08:12:00.000-07:00

I have enjoyed my first full week off work despite the fact that I have had to spend the evenings at the school dealing with an outside group that has rented the theatre. They were nice for the most part, at least nicer than they were last time they used the space. My kids learned a lot, mainly because I actually left the school for a couple hours at a time and they had to deal with the show on their own.

Anyway, the show closed last night. The kids were told they were being given shirts, no shirts ever appeared (they did receive gift cards to In and Out Hamburger). When the director of the group was thanking everyone for their help, I was thanked for loaning them set pieces. The ever present, ever so much of an a#$, vocal director was thanked for loaning them audio equipment. Yes, you read that right, loaning them audio equipment. Last time I checked the audio equipment was the theatre department's and the wireless mics (which are crap) were his. This just irritated me, the kids were pissed. They also didn't get a public thank you. They worked their butts off for a week, in the sweltering heat (we don't have AC in the theatre), for $10. I might be hard pressed to get them to work the shows for this group next year. They enjoy it, but they feel really used. I won't say anything because I don't want to sound petty, at least not out in my "real" world.

Okay, that was the ARGH~! Now on to this and that...

M has been gone for 12 days, he returns home just in time for us to head out for vacation. I really don't want to go. We are going through another rough patch with B and her feelings toward me and my marrying her dad. I don't want to leave the puppy (I will have to post some pictures...she's HUGE!). I just want to stay here and enjoy my summer and not run around like a crazy person. Wow, how many people say they don't want to go on vacation? Am I really crazy.

I have upped my traning for the Avon Walk, it is less than 90 days away and my longest walks are only at 3mi. Probably because I walk with the dog and I don't think she can walk that far and I certainly can't carry her back to the car if she loses her pep. If you would like to make a donation to my walker fund you can do that at www.avonwalk.org , I'm walker number 871001. It would be greatly appreciated.

One of my favorite blogs to read has several pictures of the lovely blogger herself. This got me thinking...I'm never in any pictures. It could be because I am 50lbs overweight and I subconsciously avoid the camera, but still...you would never know I was at most of my family functions. I am usually behind the camera. This summer I say remedy this...I will lose the 50lbs (that way I know that's not the reason and I might actually like the pictures I'm in) and I will make sure to have pictures taken of me. I did this when in China, I don't know why I don't do it all the time. I also forget to take pictures a lot of the time. This would explain the lack of pictures in my blog and why I seem to have lost my scrappy mojo. (although I am beginning to feel crafy this summer).

I have a TON of things to do before we leave tomorrow...I can't believe most of it isn't done yet. I think I will blame it on the heat...it's been too hot to do almost anything. Here is a low down of what will happen before I leave for the airport tomorrow at 5:00 am.

1. finish laundry
2. pack
3. create a dog run inside the house for the puppy
4. go to the petstore
5. type detailed instructions on how to care for pets
6. get keys made for the various housesitters to take care of pets
7. pick up audio and lighting equipment from the school to prevent it being stolen during the summer.
8. finish cleaning the house
9. buy a swimsuit (not like I haven't had TONS of time to do this)
10. clean out the fridge (I don't want to come home to anything stinky)
11. meet with the house sitters so they know how to walk the puppy
12. create lock-up checklist to prevent OCD panic at airport
13. go to the bank to deposit tax check
14. pay bills to avoid them being late while I am gone

I guess that really isn't that much. I think I might actually make it. If I actually get moving....

it's finally over...

2008-06-15T07:56:00.000-07:00

The school year has ended. My last day was on Thursday, Bella spent the day getting loved on by all my teacher friends while I tried to get checked out for summer. I have spent the last couple of days trying to get things squared away for a summer learning institute I am planning on attending (they have only been nagging me to come for 3 years) and trying to get the house ready to go on vacation (I hate leaving a dirty house).

I can definately tell the school year needed to catch up with me. Yesterday I took a 2 1/2 hour nap. Mind you I do not do naps well. It usually takes me about 3 hours to recover from taking one. Then I fell asleep on the sofa watching TV at about 8:30 and slept until almost 7:00 this morning. I guess my body was ready for some good rest. Now I am ready to hit the summer feet first.

I will spend the next week cleaning, packing and relaxing during the day and the spend the evenings at the school with an outside theatre company who is renting my space (that means they are also renting the lights and sound equipement, which I don't let anybody not in my department run). It should be interesting to say the least (I thought their last show stunk up the place). I will spent most of the time in my class prepping for next year, might as well make good use of my time.

Now I am off to hit the treadmill and take Bella for her mile walk. I hope everyone is enjoying the fab weather...it's FINALLY feeling pretty good here in ol' So Cal.

Is it just me...

2008-06-10T14:29:00.000-07:00

or is waiting two weeks to tell someone if they got a job unprofessional?

Two weeks ago I interviewed for th activities director position at my school. I know I'm nuts, but I think I can do a good job. Only three people interviewed. I have been asked on an almost daily basis if I have heard anything.

Yesterday I was told that the principal was talking to people. I never got a phone call about the position.

Today I ask my biggest competition if she has heard anything. She said P had talked to her and looked shocked that I hadn't heard anything. She said that's not cool, I agree.

I then went to the front office and told P's secretary that I have started to hear rumors and wanted to know if P was ever going to talk to me about the position. She said he was off site and then had a parent meeting after that. If he could fit me in she would let me know.

If I didn't get it, fine! I am most upset because I have been left hanging. I feel like this shows a complete lack of respect for me and what I do. Like my time isn't worth anything. I am trying to plan things for the summer and don't want to overcommit in the event I do get the job and need to do stuff for that.

I have already decided that if I don't get it I'm not interviewing again if it opens up in the future.

So, is it just me or is it just a little unprofessional to leave someone hanging.

A good day...

2008-04-03T09:43:00.001-07:00

Last Saturday we decided it was time for Bella to go Dog Beach. It was beautiful and we all had a wonderful time.

It was a gorgeous day.

Bella made lots of new friends who wanted to tumble with her.

Our friend Luke was kind enough to teach Bella how to dig in the sand.

In addition to all her doggie friends, Bella made a few new human friends as well.

By the end of the day everyone was ready for a nap

a little of this and that

2008-03-16T06:02:00.000-07:00

Several things that have been running through my mind...

1. Why does B have to be such a, well...B#$@? She is only 13 and can just get under my skin. Last night we went out and I said hi when she got into the car, she ignored me. It put me in a bad mood for the rest of the night, even though I tried to fight that. I finally said something to Michael and said I was sorry for being cranky. After we dropped her off he said something was wrong with her but she wouldn't say.

2. Why does D have to be such a B@%#@? It could explain #1, but this woman is a nut job. B had a ton of stuff to do for some church activity yesterday, yet D had to squeeze in a movie before M picked up B for visitation. We are pretty sure it was because she knew we would go see Horton Hears a Who! She wanted to make sure she got to take B to see it. The woman does things like this ALL THE TIME!

3. Why do my drama students want to do all kinds of cool stuff and then flake out on me? They talk me into planning play trips, festival trips and all kinds of other stuff and then I have to fight with kids to get them to follow through. It is killing me.

4. Why does Bella want to wake up at 4:00am and then go back to sleep at 6:00am? Since I am the "pack leader" I am the one who gets up with her and fends off the puppy attack until she is ready to go back to sleep. She is sweet and lovable, but those little bitty teeth...OUCH! She is actually doing really well with the little bit of training I have been trying.

Now for something a little more fun...

Here's a list of the AFI's Top 100 Films of all Time. Highlight the movies you have seen and then at the end add 3 that you think should be on the list.

1. CITIZEN KANE(1942)
2. CASABLANCA (1941)
3. THE GODFATHER (1972)
4. GONE WITH THE WIND (1939)
5. LAWRENCE OF ARABIA (1962)
6. THE WIZARD OF OZ (1939)
7. THE GRADUATE (1967)
8. ON THE WATERFRONT (1954)
9. SCHINDLER'S LIST (1993)
10. SINGIN' IN THE RAIN (1952)
11. IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE (1946)
12. SUNSET BOULEVARD (1950)
13. THE BRIDGE ON THE RIVER KWAI (1957)
14. SOME LIKE IT HOT (1959)
15. STAR WARS (1977)
16. ALL ABOUT EVE (1950)
17. THE AFRICAN QUEEN (1951)
18. PSYCHO (1960)
19. CHINATOWN (1974)
20. ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO'S NEST (1975)
21. THE GRAPES OF WRATH (1940)
22. 2001: A SPACE ODYSSEY (1968)
23. THE MALTESE FALCON (1941)
24. RAGING BULL (1980)
25. E.T. THE EXTRA-TERRESTRIAL (1982)
26. DR. STRANGELOVE (1964)
27. BONNIE AND CLYDE (1967)
28. APOCALYPSE NOW (1979)
29. MR. SMITH GOES TO WASHINGTON (1939)
30. THE TREASURE OF THE SIERRA MADRE (1948)
31. ANNIE HALL (1977)
32. THE GODFATHER PART II (1974)
33. HIGH NOON (1952)
34. TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD (1962)
35. IT HAPPENED ONE NIGHT (1934)
36. MIDNIGHT COWBOY (1969)
37. THE BEST YEARS OF OUR LIVES (1946)
38. DOUBLE INDEMNITY (1944)
39. DOCTOR ZHIVAGO (1965)
40. NORTH BY NORTHWEST (1959)
41. WEST SIDE STORY (1961)
42. REAR WINDOW (1954)
43. KING KONG (1933)
44. THE BIRTH OF A NATION (1915)
45. A STREETCAR NAMED DESIRE (1951)
46. A CLOCKWORK ORANGE (1971)
47. TAXI DRIVER (1976)
48. JAWS (1975)
49. SNOW WHITE AND THE SEVEN DWARFS (1937)
50. BUTCH CASSIDY AND THE SUNDANCE KID (1969)
51. THE PHILADELPHIA STORY (1940)
52. FROM HERE TO ETERNITY (1953)
53. AMADEUS (1984)
54. ALL QUIET ON THE WESTERN FRONT (1930)
55. THE SOUND OF MUSIC (1965)
56. M*A*S*H (1970)
57. THE THIRD MAN (1949)
58. FANTASIA (1940)
59. REBEL WITHOUT A CAUSE (1955)
60. RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK (1981)
61. VERTIGO (1958)
62. TOOTSIE (1982)
63. STAGECOACH (1939)
64. CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE THIRD KIND (1977)
65. THE SILENCE OF THE LAMBS (1991)
66. NETWORK (1976)
67. THE MANCHURIAN CANDIDATE (1962)
68. AN AMERICAN IN PARIS (1951)
69. SHANE (1953)
70. THE FRENCH CONNECTION (1971)
71. FORREST GUMP (1994)
72. BEN-HUR (1959)
73. WUTHERING HEIGHTS (1939)
74. THE GOLD RUSH (1925)
75. DANCES WITH WOLVES (1990)
76. CITY LIGHTS (1931)
77. AMERICAN GRAFFITI (1973)
78. ROCKY (1976)
79. THE DEER HUNTER (1978)
80. THE WILD BUNCH (1969)
81. MODERN TIMES (1936)
82. GIANT (1956)
83. PLATOON (1986)
84. FARGO (1996)
85. DUCK SOUP (1933)
86. MUTINY ON THE BOUNTY (1935)
87. FRANKENSTEIN (1931)
88. EASY RIDER (1969)
89. PATTON (1970)
90. THE JAZZ SINGER (1927)
91. MY FAIR LADY (1964)
92. A PLACE IN THE SUN (1951)
93. THE APARTMENT (1960)
94. GOODFELLAS (1990)
95. PULP FICTION (1994)
96. THE SEARCHERS (1956)
97. BRINGING UP BABY (1938)
98. UNFORGIVEN (1992)
99. GUESS WHO'S COMING TO DINNER (1967)
100. YANKEE DOODLE DANDY (1942)

My Picks:

1. Princess Bride

2. Breakfast at Tiffany

3. The English Patient (I think I might have been the only person on the planet to absolutely LOVE this movie, the book is great as well).

I'd like you to meet...

2008-02-25T19:39:00.000-08:00

Bella

Bella is the newest addition to our happy family. She was adopted on Saturday from Friends of Orange County Homeless Animals and is just the sweetest thing EVER!

She is believed to be some sort of Pit Bull mix. We think she actually looks a bit more like a boxer mix, but what do we know. We are enjoying all the fun stuff and can't wait until she sleeps through the night. Her screaming just makes me so sad.

At about 6 weeks old we have a lot to look forward to and many years of being a happy family.

She is doing great and is actually already learning that we want her potty outside and that if she runs to the back door we will let her out (and that's after only 2 days).

Pitty Party...

2008-02-20T15:26:00.000-08:00

Yep, that's what I'm having, a pitty party. I sat today and watch the 50 or more kids who take choir perform for our cultural arts week - choir day (my kids get Friday) and I wondered why my program is floundering. Do I expect too much of them? Do I drive them away? What is going on?

I struggle to get kids into my classes, I struggle to get kids to audition for shows, I struggle to get kids to work on tech crews. I don't know what I'm doing wrong.

The kids seem to like me, but they just won't commit. It's killing me. I feel my spirit and my passion fading. I am tired of hearing the kids get excited about the things I propose and then completely blow it off when the time for action comes.

They wanted a play trip, I have done most of the leg work, everything except order the tickets. I told them I needed the money this week. No money has come in so far and I will not order tickets without money in hand. They want to go to a competition, I have gotten the request approved and even got the principal to pay for my busses, not a single kid has paid their fee or told me what material they want to perform.

Maybe I'm getting jaded. Maybe I'm just tired. But as of right now I am considering other career options. I want to be excited to come to work, I want to be excited about the next project, I don't want to worry about where I'm going to find the kids to be in the next show.

goodbye old friend...

2008-02-18T13:38:00.000-08:00

Friday night at about 8:00pm Michael and I arrived home from dinner and grocery shopping and had the make the very difficult decision that it was Stoli's time. We rushed him to the emergency vet clinic where we said our final good-byes.

Stoli was the coolest dog ever. He loved to play "chase-me-around-the-yard", loved to go on long walks and was great with everyone he met.

I am so sad that I had to let him go, but he was ready and I am glad that it was a short time since we found out we would be losing him. I don't know what I would have done if it had taken months.

Stoli got to spend his last month going on lots of extra walks (even in the freezing cold rain), and spending time in the house (he had been previously banished because of a cat issue). And his last week he got to go for tons of car rides, just because I wanted to take him with me, he spent time at the school where he got to go after the bunnies (no harm came to any bunnies, he just wanted to check them out) and play with my drama kids. This was one loved doggie.

Final good-byes are always hard...but we all know that Stoli is in a better place. And he knows that he was well loved and will always be missed.

Stoli-Dog update...

2008-02-11T19:19:00.000-08:00

Today Stoli went in for his 3 week checkup and another urinalisis. Unfortunately things did not go well. In the past 4-5 day Stoli has completely stopped eating (with the exception of the few things I gave him that I wasn't supposed to). Also, his eye, the one with the scratch, has turned blood red.

The vet said there is something "metabolical" going on there. He recommended that Stoli see an opthamologist. That's not all, then we moved on to the not eating and the 5lb weight loss in the last 3 weeks. The vet said it felt like there is fluid in Stoli's abdomin.

Stoli is staying at the vet tonight in order to have x-rays and such tomorrow morning. It is looking more and more like he does actually have some type of cancer. The vet even went as far as to say that if it has sread past the spleen he wouldn't recommend surgery.

I about lost it on my way home. I feel terrible because I didn't love on Stoli enough before I left the vet. He was antsy and as soon as the tech took him he was off and running, ready to explore the rest of the building.
I feel like there is something more I could have done to take better care of him.

So, needless to say I'm going to be a wreck tomorrow waiting for the vet to call me and let me know what is going on. I know he's only a dog, but keep him in your thoughts. He's my buddy and I really want him to be okay.

Update: I got the call from the vet this afternoon...it looks like he has a tumor on his spleen that has metastasized to his heart. I am getting ready to go bring him home. I will get more information then. But it's not looking good for my sweet boy. Now comes one of the hardest decisions ever, how far do we go.

Update 2: It's confirmed. The radiologist gave the same prognosis. We are going to lose our sweet thing. I have him at school with me right now and he is loving all the attention. Tomorrow he will probably stay home because I don't want to burden the Ag teacher, who was so kind as to let me bring him in for half a day today. I will probably bring him in on Tuesday since it will be a super late day. And we will go from there.

a call for help...

2008-02-10T16:49:00.000-08:00

Each year the high school participates in the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society's annual penny drive (in fact we have been the top money raising school for something like 8 of the past 10 years). This year I want my theatre department to play a larger part in the fund raising efforts. To do this we are putting together what I am calling the Cancer Project.

The Cancer Project will be a performance piece that includes poetry, scenes and monologues dealing with cancer. All of the performances will be bookended with stats and information regarding cancer that might take people by surprise.

What I am asking for is submissions. I would like for anyone who has been effected by cancer, cancer of any kind, We are choosing not to just focus on Lymphoma or Leukemia, to submit your story or your writings.

We will also be putting up pictures of survivors and those who fought the battle but did not survive in the lobby as a tribute to why we are doing the project. If you would like to submit a photo with their information (i.e. name, type of cancer, year diagnosed, years surviving or (sadly) the year they passed) let me know. I would love to share our tribute with your loved one.

By the way, all the profit from the production will be donated to the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. We are hoping to raise $2000 on this project.

poetry and such

2008-02-09T20:23:00.000-08:00

Tonight I sit in my classroom while TMR is in it's final performance of Bye Bye Birdie. I will be glad when this is over, I just want to go home at a reasonable hour. I would much rather get nothing done at home than nothing done at school.

I sit in my room looking at my English text books knowing I should be picking out some poetry for Monday. I look at the scale drawing my tech class did and know they need to be graded for Monday. I look at the presentation board I wanted to get done 2 nights ago and still haven't started (I'm having a bit of a creativity-jam and can't come up with anything to do on it).

You would think with spending 5 nights here until 10:00 pm I would be so caught up. But no...here I sit thinking "I have to figure out what I'm doing on Monday".

Trust me I do this all the time...

2008-02-07T18:11:00.000-08:00

I have spent the past week at school late every night and not because I'm in a production, but because the dread VD organized a local group called the Music Room into renting my theatre. I call it mine because I use it the most and really care about the space. My kids are running the lights and sound because it is my new equipment in there and I really don't anybody to screw it up.

I don't mind doing these things. What I do mind is when the director of said production group talks down to me or talks down to my kids. I also mind when the VD lets these people do whatever they want in my space with my stuff. At this time both of spot lights are down because they weren't bright enough, some strange man has patched into the back of my sound board so he can illegally videotape the show, they are using all kinds of my stuff without asking (including the blocking of some girl into standing on my sofa, now I don't come to their facility and stand on their furniture). It's just nutty!

The one advantage to all this chaos is that my kids are getting to see how another director works. They say they like be better. It was nice. It is also giving me some time to try and catch up (you can see I'm doing a good job at that one). So, in an effort to be the productive teacher/director I am here is a list of what I will get done tonight...

1. grade papers from today
2. make fliers for our first ever Thespian Inductions
3. prep for tomorrow's lesson on Dadaism (makes for a really fun poetry project)
4. update the list of students who owe me money
5. figure out what the heck I'm going to do with my tech kids tomorrow
6. design my display board for the upcoming ROP Career Fair

That should take me right up to about 10:00pm when all should be done. Then it's home to get some sleep and do it all again tomorrow night.

I know that I don't know my new equipment as well as I should but I do happen to teach 4 different preps, direct shows, run the staff club, participate on the school site council, am a union rep and cook for my husband. I'm sorry if I can't spent hours on end in the theatre just learning the equipment. And even if I don't know it as well as I should, I know a hell of a lot.

tag, you're it...

2008-02-01T07:47:00.000-08:00

I've been tagged with a book meme so here we go...

First the rules:

1. Pick up the nearest book of at least 123 pages.
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the next three sentences.
5. Tag five people.

The nearest book is The Silence of the Lambs by Thomas Harris

"No witnesses. The victim found in West Virginia remained unidendtified. West Virginia."

Not very interesting or thought provoking, but it was the nearest book.

Now for five people...Sophia, Chatty, Lou, Carrie and Dinkin Mess.

Have fun!

can you say procrastination...

2008-01-28T20:59:00.000-08:00

I sure can. I should be grading papers right now. Grades are due Wednesday and I still have about 25 essays to grade. I guess if they were actually good it wouldn't be so bad...but as the essays are written by 10th graders, they stink.

Instead of grading I cooked dinner, cooked dinner for tomorrow, made lunch for tomorrow, talked to the dog (who is doing better) and looked for a good recipe for potato soup (which I didn't find).

I won't be staying up late to grade, I would like to get up early and get in work out and if I stay up past 10pm there is no way I'm getting up at 4am.

Things are really starting to ramp up again around here. I mean they were slow for a whole 4 days (which is why I couldn't grade papers, I was enjoying the not having to be at a rehearsal).

5 Upcoming events:
1. Student directed one-acts
2. Cancer project
3. Thespian Inductions
4. Massive testing
5. Auditions for the show I'm interested in doing

5 Things I have to do Tuesday
1. finish grades
2. scrub kitchen counters
3. laundry
4. start taxes
5. clean craft room

5 People I need to call or email on Tuesday
1. Grandma G
2. Mom
3. my sister K
4. my sister S
5. C

5 places I need to go
1. Target
2. Trader Joe's
3. Michael's
4.

Okay, I guess I only have 3 places to go tomorrow. And with that I'm off to grade a few papers before I head to bed.

a bit of a whine...

2008-01-24T17:31:00.000-08:00

Why is it okay for M and B to walk in the house and immediately turn off the very fun cooking show I was listening to while balancing the checkbook (which is a whole other reason to whine) and begin to play annoying games? Why? Why is that okay!!!!! It wouldn't be okay for me to do it. And can I just say that Wii billards has the most annoying music of all, it's the same little tune, over and over and over and over...you get the picture.

Okay, enough whining, on to better things.

I am trying a new recipe, posole. M likes it, I'm a bit scared of it. To me it resembles something I have seen the cat leave on the floor. I'm not even sure if I will taste it. I'll let you know later. I might be eating PB&J.

And now for something completely positive. My dear bloggy friend Sophia put forth a challenge to list 10 things positive about myself. This will be a hard today, since most days I feel like I suck, so here we go...

1. I am a good and loyal friend.
2. I am a pretty good cook
3. I am a good director of plays
4. I have a fabulous raport with my students
5. I am responsible
6. I am creative
7. I am a wonderful Aunt
8. I am the hostest with the mostest
9. I can make pretty stained/leaded glass stuff
10. I am a strong reader (now I'm stretching)

Man that was hard! Now you do it!

On a mission to save second base...

2008-01-23T11:59:00.000-08:00

As several of you know three years ago my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer. Since then I spend each year training and fundraising for the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer. Nothing has changed this year except for my walker number. I plan on raising $3000 this year. I know that sounds like a lot, but the funds go for such a worthy cause. Did you know that every three minutes another man or woman is diagnosed with breast cancer (yes, men can get it too). That is just astonishing to me.

When my mom was diagnosed I made the commitment to not sit back and just watch this disease destroy so many vibrant people. I made the commitment to get involved in any way I can.

So, here is my shameless plea for support... My walker number is 871001, please go to www.avonfoundation.org and check out my walker page (which is still under construction). Follow my progress and please by all means make a donation.

Things a getting better....

2008-01-16T11:46:00.000-08:00

I just talked to Stoli's vet-tech (not the actual vet) and the blood tests are finally back and they are normal. So that is a good thing, it means most likely no tumor and since the didn't tell me he needed x-rays that tells me they think it's something else.

Today I will pick up a slew of other pills to feed him and some perscripttion dog food. Hopefully this will fix everything. The Vet told the tech that Stoli is losing protein through his kidney, this has happened to Stoli before and is apparently something Huskeys are prone to. I know it is pretty much my fault, I spoiled him over the holidays and fed him way too many table scraps and let the house guests get away with doing it as well. Normally I'm pretty good with treating table scraps and bones like special treats for him, during Christmas and New Year's I let fly and he got everything. I guess the vet bill is part of my punishment (the other part is all the worry for poor Stoli-dog).

I can say his energy is getting a bit better. He still wants to just lie down and sleep, but when he's up he enjoys his walks and today wanted to play the "chase-me-around-the-yard" game (me chase him, not the other way around). He hasn't done that in a few days. So, for that I say YIPPY!!!!!

Another thing that is getting better...the stack of papers on my desk is shrinking. With the semester coming to an end that is a very, very good thing. Now, I must get back to my grading and being productive.

Have you ever...

2008-01-14T15:03:00.000-08:00

tried to get a "free catch" urine sample from a dog? Let me tell you it is not an easy task. In fact I was a little mortified as I walked through the park with the dog and a cup. I was pretty sure people thought I was nuts. Now that I think about it, what in the world are people, other than dog walkers, doing in the park at 7:15am. So, there I am, dog on lease, cup in hand, every time he started to lift his leg, I dove in for the catch, he would jump back and look at me like I had lost my mind. It was pretty funny to see would be my guess. It was like some sort of nutty tug-o-war.

The entire free catch experience was brought on because the vet found blood in the urine sample taken during the exam. Now, get this, they said that it could have been because of the collection process, yet we have to pay to have the tests done again. M dropped off the sample and instead of saying something he just paid it. I don't see why if the sample was bad because of their collection process I should have to pay to have the tests run AGAIN!!! We are now into this for $300 and still don't know what is wrong with Stoli.

I can say that he appears to be feeling better. When I called on Saturday for the test results they thought it might be cysts, so possibly not a tumor. So that is good. He is on antibiotics and is eating a different diet (we aren't a canned food kind of dog family and he is loving this special treat).

So, with that said, I don't have much new information other than, he seems to be feeling better, he is enjoying sleeping in the house, although it might end soon. I have encountered what appears to be pee in my library and in the hallway - and it definitely is more pee than would come out of a cat. If Stoli would just figure out how to use the dog door everything would be fine. He seems to be scared of it, big wussy dog.

poor Stoli...

2008-01-11T09:31:00.000-08:00

I have had to take the day off work today in order to take Stoli to the vet. His is very lethargic and one of his eyes is all milky and goopy. I am so worried about him. I suppose I could have taken him to an emergency vet, but feel more comfortable taking him to his regular doctor-buddy. Not to mention that he has a history of liver disease, the regular vet has all those records.

So, I am anxiously waiting for the time to drive to the vet. I guess the only good thing coming from it is that I'm cleaning in order to stop clock-watching.

I'll post an update as soon as I get back.

Update: Stoli has a scratch on his left eye, which explains why it is so goopy. That is easily treated with ointment. The lathargic behavior, now that is another story...The vet said his tummy is "doughy" and the other vet said the same thing. This could possibly mean some type of tumor on his spleen. I am waiting for blood work to come back. If the red blood count is low then we have to do x-rays. The vet also warned that typically these type of tumors are already malignant by the time they are discovered. That was not what I wanted to hear.

Now the hard part for M and I, we have to decide where to draw the line on how much we are willing to spend. Husky's can live 12 -14 years, Stoli is about 9. He was a pound puppy so we aren't sure exactly, the pound thought we was about 3 when I adopted him and I've had him for almost 6 years. It at this point that I tell eveyone who has a pet to buy pet insurance. I always thought it was silly, and then Stoli had illness about 2 years ago and I toyed with the idea, but never got around to it. Well, I wish someone had sent me that "to-it" because I could really use it now. So for the love of your pets, spend the $30 a month. It could save a lot in the long run.

I will keep everyone posted on Stoli (I call for blood results tomorrow).

a bit of creativity...

2008-01-04T16:41:00.000-08:00

I have had my scrapbook mojo on for the past couple of days. I have completed 2 2-page layouts to finish Christmas 2005 (yes, I'm a bit behind) and a 1-page layout. I normally don't do 1-pagers, it messes with the continuity of my album, but I have a few other pictures suited for a 1-page so I went with it.

I am not entirely happy with the way this page turned out. The swirlies just aren't working for me. When they were just in ink they needed more, and the glitter is a bit much. I wish I could have found my gold paint pen, that would be been perfect. Oh well...it is what it is and I love the picture.

The picture is of my nephew, W, on his birthday in 2005. He had just turned 1 and was just dead tired from all the family stuff that had been going on. That was the year we brought in my sister from Colorado as a surprise for my mom.

TOYS!!!!!

2008-01-03T15:52:00.000-08:00

This year I got a couple of way cool toys. Those who know me know I hate, hate, HATE video games. I just don't find them any fun. That is until my mom managed to buy me and each of my sisters one of these...

The Wii is the best thing EVER! I never thought I would say that about a gaming system. That fact that this doesn't have to be a sit-on-your-butt-shoot-em-up game. I love playing bowling and tennis. I can't wait for our second set of controllers to come in that way M and I can box against each other.

I am completely addicted to Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix game. The controllers work as your wand and you can cast spells, solve puzzles and explore Hogwarts. So much fun. My next purchase of a game will be one that my sister rented from the video store, Marble Mania. It's like that old game where you would put the marble on the box and then control it with knobs on the four sides to get the marble through the maze. In the Wii version you go through different mazes and different levels, so much fun.

If you are looking to buy a gaming system for your family I highly recommend this one. It is so much more interactive. I don't think we have laughed as hard together as we did while playing the Marble Mania game.

Then with the eminent death of my cell phone, M and I decided we would go and look at new phones even though I wasn't eligible for an upgrade until June. AT&T store was having a big sale. So, I ended up with this...

It is way more phone than I actually need, but we figure I could grow into it. I have Internet, a camera, GPS (if I want to pay a little extra), bluetooth. I have a better phone than my techno-geek husband. It's lots of fun, and I can actually make a phone call in under 5 minutes now (yes, the first few times it did take that long for me to figure it out).

Anybody else get any cool toys this year?

Happy New Year!

2007-12-31T14:32:00.000-08:00

With the new year I have lots to be thankful for...

1. My wonderful new husband. I know marriage is tough, I recognize that I am not really a marriage kind of gal (a little to independent I guess), but M gets it and gives me lots of space when I need it and lots of support when I need that.

2. My family. Everyone is healthy and safe, even if some of them aren't making the best decisions (or at least not dealing with them in the most appropriate way), they are working through things and are happy with their choices.

3. My new extended family. M's family has welcomed me in with open arms. Despite the fact that M's ex tried to sabotage things in the beginning (yes, tried to turn his family against him and me very early on in our relationship).

4. My health issues are serious, but manageable, and not as serious as we first thought. That really is something to be thankful for. I will take the 12 pills a day over what the alternative would have been.

I have several things that need to be meditated over (or prayed over if that is what you go in for)...

1. My B-I-L M3 is in Iraq. This is his third tour. The first two he came home with only minor injuries (of his own doing because he can be stupid, come on he's a boy). Even though I am not his biggest fan, I do want him to come home safe.

2. B and her issues. I need to disengage from the situation for my sanity. But I do hope for her's she is able to work through her issues and that her mom will help her.

I also have several goals I plan on working toward in the new year...

1. Cut our credit debt by 1/4
2. Better utilize my time
3. Read more
4. Learn to knit with more than one stitch
5. Spend more time with friends and family
6. Spend more time in the gym
7. Audition for at least one show
8. Take more pictures
9. Redesign my garden yard
10. Make our honeymoon trip to Italy happen (this is a biggie and may hamper #1)

What are you thankful for in 2008? What are your goals?

Not enough hours...

2007-12-31T14:03:00.001-08:00

in the day to get everything done. I just realized it has been a month since I have last posted something, I haven't been keeping up with the majority of the wonderful blogs I have discovered (this is mainly because the school server has decided to block my blogroll so I can't see the blogs). So much has been going on.

The holidays have been pretty eventful around here. M and I hosted Christmas Eve dinner for his sister's family (who just relocated to CA from OR), and my family, plus we had both B and L with us this year. So, with a full house M decided he wanted to smoke a turkey (and I forgot to take pictures). I was a bit worried, something about cooking a piece of meat for 14 hours makes me nervous. IT TURNED OUT WONDERFUL!!!!!!

M's mom arrived the day after Christmas and will stay with use until 1/3. L was with us until yesterday, when she flew back to UT. B was with us until 12/29. I won't go into detail, but things aren't getting any better with B, in fact things hit an all time low during the visit. I really wish I would start to see some improvement in her relationship with M, but because of me I don't think that will ever happen. Not that I am doing anything to prevent it, I just exist and that is enough to make her so mad she lets it effect her relationship with her dad. It is very sad and made worse because her mom likes it this way. As long as B is mad at her dad, mom gets her way.

My health issues haven't improved, but I am on a ton of meds which are supposed to help. I go back in 3 months to check and see if anything has improved. I can only hope.

Now it's back to work, I have tons to do before I can even think about getting ready to go out tonight.

Have a wonderful New Year's Eve whatever your celebrations will include. Be safe! I know we will.

oh my goodness...

2007-11-30T21:35:00.000-08:00

way too much going on.

1. Painting the great room. The room is huge and I am doing most of the work by myself. I am almost half way done. When we bought the house the first thing we wanted to do was paint but ended up in escrow hell and had to move super fast. Now, 6 months later I'm finally getting the chance to get it down. We are going from blue and pink (yuck!) to a couple really nice shades of brown. I'll post pictures as soon as it's done.

2. Decorating. I need to get it done and want it done this weekend. Enough said.

3. Medical mumbo jumbo. I have to have a medical test done on Monday. I have been having some gastrointestinal problems and the doctor wants to figure out exectly what is going on. I won't go into all the completely disgusting details, lets just say that doctor's are gross.

4. Christmas Shopping. I managed to get most of it finished. Got to love Black Friday. I finish that day every year.

5. New York. I leave for the Big Apple on Tuesday. I am very excited about the trip although a little nervous about the flight (see item 3). What is even better, the stage hand strike is over, which means the shows are running again!

6. Auditions. I was supposed to go on an audition on Sunday night. This plan has been derailed by item 3. The prep for the procedure begins Sunday afternoon. I am keeping my options open and will see how I feel at that time, but it's not looking good.

So that is my life in a nutshell. Now it's back to painting.

I survived!

2007-11-18T10:12:00.000-08:00

It's over, done, finished, and best of all is survived and I'm not sick!

The show went off wonderfully. The audience really enjoyed the production and the kids were amazing. As wonderful as it all was I have one incident that has tainted the experience and has made it very difficult for me to ever cast a particular kid again.

Evidently there was a mild verbal altercation between him and two of the girls in the cast as they came back to the school for their call time. They started out making some slightly racial jokes back and forth (I don't really get that) and then all of a sudden he just flipped out on them. From the accounts I have heard he was participating in the joking, it wasn't like they started to include him and he was immediately offended.

They bickered back and forth for two hours and let it come to a head 2 minuted before the show was supposed to start. Literally, I was talking with audience memebers and my stage manager comes running up to me and says that I am needed immediately backstage. On the way he told me what was going on. I laid into the kids first about how this was stupid, that they had a show to do and they needed to get over it and give the audience what they came for, a great performance. Then I started calming them down. I was angry first because they needed to understand the gravity of the situation and what they were doing. This was on Friday.

Come Saturday I thought everything was fine when during intermission the SM cames to me again with a paniced look, it was starting again, only this time it was pretty much just the boy. He was getting in people's faces again and he shoved one of the freshmen girls (yes, we refer to them as a collective). I went back stage and just walked from group to group and told them the exact same thing, I didn't want to hear their side, that nobody was to be getting into anybodies face, that they needed to suck it up and get through the next hour and after that I didn't care if they ever talked to each other again.

After the show I talked with my AP who came to the performance and told her what was going on. After the Thanksgiving holiday she wants to talk to the girls who where involved and then she will meet with the boy. We are all concerned that it might escalate from him shoving someone into him actually hitting someone. And they are backstage by themselves, I may have to station a parent backstage from this point on.

This kid has pretty much sealed with fate for future productions. He is pretty much "drama" in every production he does (and not in the good way). I would rather not work with him and have a good experience then have kids quit the program because he makes them miserable and they can't work with him.

ARGH! The joy of working with teenagers.

Next on the school schedule: The Silly Project. My advanced students are creating a performance piece for the new Mentally Handicapped (MH) program kids. There are 11 MH kids now on our campus. The project is based on a project we watched a documentary about (Yellow Brick Road). We are going to get these kids on stage and see what they can do. We will be inviting a couple of classes , parents, administration and people from the district. It should prove to be a whole bunch of fun.

On the Home schedule: The rest of the day is devoted to recovering my house. It has just gone all bad with me being at school so much and M has actually had the nerve to tell me I have a lot of stuff to put away. I told him I knew and called him Mr. Obvious. So, while he is working today, I'm cleaning, doing laundry and looking for all the holiday stuff in preparation for Thanksgiving and Christmas.

Now, it's time to get some work done.

change of service...

2007-10-27T08:55:00.001-07:00

that's what I'm considering. I am developing a complete disdain for blogger. I'm not happy with an incident that occurred when I changed to a gmail account. Google automatically made that account my user name, I don't want that account linked to this blog at all. There are just some things I like to keep in separate areas of my life.

I know that sounds silly, but it's the way I like it.

So, what I would like to ask...those of you who use other blog services, what do you like? What would you recommend? Is there a service where I could just transfer my current blog content over? Or is it just gone forever?

Thanks a bunch!

drowning...

2007-10-17T05:01:00.000-07:00

That's what I'm doing, drowning. I have come to the conclusion that I will never catch up, I will never be prepared and I will NOT feel like I am being successful this year.

I have 4 preps (for those of you who don't teach, that means I teach for different classes), one I haven't had to teach in at least 10 years. I have a student teacher, which actually makes things harder. Everyone keeps saying "but you have a student teacher to help". What they don't understand is that the word "STUDENT" means they don't know what they are doing yet. They are just that, a student and are learning and do need my attention from time to time. (I'm still trying to figure out why they would give the likes of me a student teacher).

I really feel like this might end up being the last year I teach. I am just not liking the feelings of "I suck", "I don't know what I'm doing", "I don't have any support" and the mentality that I can handle everything. I used to be able to do that, but somewhere along the line I have lost that ability. I can no longer handle it all! I'm just not that good anymore.

I am so busy I can't even find the time to get into the gym, hell, I can't find the time to work out in my living room. I try, but in the last two days I have developed a nasty cough, can't do anything even mildly related to working out when I have a coughing fit every two minutes.

So, with all that said and feeling like I truly do suck eggs in the job I used to love...I am off to get ready to head to school and have another low self-esteem filled day.

Ay me!

2007-10-09T17:19:00.000-07:00

I live in amazment each year at how incredibly busy I am during the school year. I am smack in the middle of rehearsal for Midsummer, have a one-act opening next week, need to decide what the kids are doing second quarter and need to get my tech kids building platforms and stairs like crazy. (M has been trying to talk me into a truck for months, today I wish he had succeeded, I need to buy lumber!)

It's breast cancer awarness month! Are you aware? Some of you may remember my brief adventure with dying my hair pink for the Avon walk? Well guess what! I'm going to be pink for the entire month of October. It's been almost two weeks, I love it and never want to go back. The color is "hot hot pink" by Manic Panic. It ROCKS!!!!! (Even if it does look a bit like Lacey from Rock of Love) And in case your interested, I signed up for the walk again next year! Let the fundraising begin!!!!

M is spending most of the month in Vegas working on various shows. It's very strange to only be married 3 months and have him leave town for so long. Although, I have discovered that being married really doesn't suit my attitude. I have been pretty gumpy lately. I absolutely LOVE M. There is something about being married that just sets me off. So, we have decided that I will just pretend that we aren't married and things haven't changed that dramatically and see if my attitude gets adjusted to one we both like better.

A word on procrastination...I'm the queen! As I talk about the length of my to-do lists I sit and write a blog that nobody will read or care about, but it makes me feel better. I should be grading the bazillion papers that are on my desk waiting to be graded and returned, only I don't feel like it. I'm tired and I just don't want to do it. I guess I could grade a few and then go home and sit on the sofa and procrastinate on the stuff that needs to be done there...

theatre in review

2007-09-24T12:52:00.000-07:00

This weekend was fab. I got to see lots of theatre, during the school year 2 plays in a weekend is a lot!

So, here's what I saw...

Saturday night M took me on a hot date to the Gala Opening of the Camino Real Playhouse's production of

It was a really fun time. Riff Raff was amazing. If you haven't had the opportunity to see the live stage version of this cult movie classic...then get off your duff and get to the theatre. It really is a lot of fun.

Then on Sunday we had tickets to

while the show was enjoyable, it just lacked the spark that live performance usually has. I am hopeful that it was because it was closing night and not that it had been a bad run.

Upcoming shows on my social calendar include...

We also have tickets to Spamalot, but I couldn't find a good graphic.

I love theatre!

remembering what it is all about...

2007-09-15T17:08:00.000-07:00

After a 9 1/2 year battle with breast cancer a dear friend has passed. It is so very sad, we got the email on Monday. D was only 44. She is just one of the many, many reasons I am so commited to the breast cancer cause.

She and her husband, K, where the perfect couple. He even went as far as selling his share in the company he helped start when they were told they should get their affairs in order because treatment wasn't working. He wanted to spend all the time he could with D. They were fun, enjoyed not only each others company but brought so many people into that loving circle.

D offered me so much hope and support when my mom was diagnosed and going through treatment. At that point D had finished her second fight with cancer. She remained strong through all three of battles.

This last time the doctors had discovered cancer in her chest cavity. She had gone in when she just didn't feel right after one of her workouts (she was a tri-athelet). She never gave up, even when they told her treatment wasn't working. She continued treatment until it was just making her too sick to enjoy her life. At that point she decided to stop treatment and have a quality of life with her husband and two children (the youngest is a junior in college). They took wonderful trips and really enjoyed each other while they had the time.

The last time I saw D was in June at a wedding. She looked great and we talked about seeing each other at my wedding and her wanting to meet my mom because she knew her story. They missed the wedding because D wasn't doing well. I never got a chance to visit with her again.

I am sad that I didn't get to know her better. I am glad I had the opportunity to get to know her as well as I did. She really is an inspiration for me, to remember to not give up no matter how bad it gets, to love those around me with my full heart and let those people know I love them.

I guess the point I really want to get across is let those you love know that you love them. Love them like there is no tomorrow, because there might not be.

Please keep K and the kids in your thoughts and prayers as they say formal goodbyes at the funeral tomorrow. Pray that they remember the good times and put the bad behind them.

And to you, my bloggy friends, I love you and send you all good thoughts and wishes.

eggs

2007-09-08T20:38:00.000-07:00

Have you ever noticed that organic, free-range eggs are almost three times more expensive than regular eggs? Why is that?

It is so bad that I have actually stopped buying them unless I am at the farmer's market.

I have noticed that everything organic is more expensive. I would really like to go completely organic and natural, but with it almost tripling the cost of groceries I just can't do it. Even if I really want to. How sad is that?

one week down...

2007-08-31T15:36:00.000-07:00

We're back, we're chugging along and all is going well. So far I am loving my students, then again it's only been two days.

My classes are not so big (pretty sad when you consider under 40 not so big). I have a really big Theatre 1 class and 22 in Advanced Theatre. That is the biggest that class has been since I came to this school 4 years ago. I guess the program is growing a bit.

I have picked up a new class with the ROP program. I am teaching Theatre Tech. It is going to be so much fun.

Productions lined up so far include A Midsummer Night's Dream for the school's fall production.
Then in my Advanced class the kids will be directing one-acts while I direct The Suessifcation of Romeo and Juliet with the. That will be my modeling show for how to direct a play. After that there has been a request for a murder mystery play by the advanced students.

And here is the big news...I told the VD that I won't be working on the musical this year. I am done working with him (I didn't tell him that part). I told him it was just too much stress and I want to take care of my health this year. He seemed to understand, didn't seem upset and said he doesn't know if he's going to do one or not. Should be interesting. The Drama kids have started telling me that if I'm not doing it, they aren't doing it. I will be directing a spring play instead.

My new lighting and sound system come in starting next week. I am so excited I can hardly contain myself. Imagine doing a play with real audio, cool lighting and all kinds of fun stuff. The kids are walking on air about this.

This is going to be an awesome year. One full of positive thinking and postive happenings. I REFUSE to let anything get me down this year. I know I said that last year and actually did pretty well until we hit the musical. This year there is nothing standing in my way.

Yosemite

2007-08-07T14:26:00.000-07:00

Although I have lived in California my entire life and my family camped for our vacations while growing up I had NEVER been to Yosemite. In fact, I'm note sure I had ever been mountain camping. We usually camped near water, lakes, rivers, beach, that type of stuff.

M on the other hand grew up going to Yosemite. It's his favorite place to go. So, that is where we spent our first vacation as a married couple.

If you have never been, get online and book a trip! It is a most amazing place.

This is the first view you get of Half Dome as you start to enter the valley. You can actually hike to the top of it. We didn't. Niether one of us is in that kind of shape. But I plan on doing it before it die. Apparently it's only 16 miles round trip, the problem comes into the nature of the trip. It's up hill, or mountain I should say, and the last bit, in which you actually climb the dome is done with pull ropes. We talked to people who did it and it sounds SO cool. That is my next big goal.

Bridalvail falls. We actually climbed in to this area. There is a vista point and from there you can climb boulders to get closer to the falls. I am so glad I did that. It was beautiful. I didn't go as far as M and the kids did. I'm a wimp like that. I had never been bouldering before. M was just happy I did it.

I got to see a bear! This was the best! There were only a couple of things I really wanted to do in Yosemite and one of them was to raft the river. Well, the river was down by the time we went so the rafting was closed. Getting to see a bear completely made up for that. She was in an apple tree in the Curry Village parking lot. Apparently she had been hanging out there all day. I watched her for about an hour. And took tons of pictures. I won't bore you will all of them. Just the one. (Unless you want more, I would be more than happy to share) I was probably only 30-40 feet away from her. The rangers did a good job keeping people a safe distance away while letting us get close enough to get some good pictures and really enjoy the actual wildlife in the park.

I also saw lots of deer and tons and tons fo squirels.

Our closest encounter with wildlife happened our second night in the park. M and I were in our cabin, M had been up late reading the final Harry Potter book. It was hot so we had left the door open until about 12:30. After M finally went to bed, door shut and everything, we hear this scratching noise. I sit up bolt straight in bed, he jumps up and turns on the light, the noise stops. Neither one of us has any idea what it might be. We did know that squirels had been trying to enter our cabin during the day when we were in there with the door open. We thought maybe one got stuck, but couldn't find it.

We turn off the light and try to go back to sleep. A few minutes later we hear the scratching again. Same thing, he turns on the light, I sit up and the noise stops. By this point I say "I'm scared" and he replys with "So am I". (that's my big strong man for you)

We turn off the light and I stay sitting up. I'm going to figure out what this monster that is stalking us really is. I listen intently, finally the scratching starts again. He turns on the light, I carefully get out of bed as to not upset the thing that seems to be scratching in the trashcan. I slowly move the can by the door, poke it with my shoe and look around like the thing could have gotten out of the can without me seeing it.

I wander around the room for a few minutes. Then take the bag out of the can, maybe the monster will be traped in the bag. I open the door to put it outside, bears be damned I wasn't walking to a trashcan with a monster in my hand, when I catch a glint in the can itself. I look closer and find a little, bitty field mouse. Some how this little guy had gotten in the trashcan, under the bag and was stuck. I put the can outside the door, tipped it over and the little guy ran for his life.

Man, we felt pretty silly about it the next day. But damn it, It could have been a bear in the cabin! Well, it could have been!

just a vent...

2007-08-06T18:24:00.000-07:00

The weekend of my wedding I found out that my dad and his wife are splitting up. Actually I didn't find out the weekend of the wedding, I actually found out a few days after. But it all really came down right before the wedding.

My dad hasn't actually talked to me about it. My sister's husband told me what was going on. Apparently my dad has engaged in a bit of an indiscretion, to put it nicely. Pretty much the same thing he did before he left my mom. C (his wife) has told him he has to be the one to tell me and my sisters and apparently I am the only one he hasn't talked to.

He called me today to try to set up a time to come and talk to me and M about what is going on. He knows that I know bits and pieces, but not the whole story.

I am avoiding the call back for the time being. I just don't know what to say to him. I really like C and plan on keeping her in my life. In fact I like her much more than I like my dad, especially after this stunt. I know that people make mistakes, that they screw up, they make poor choices, I've done it. But to continue down the same path again and again, it just doesn't make sense.

coming to an end...

2007-08-03T14:46:00.000-07:00

Summer is quickly coming to an end. I can't believe I go back to school in just a few weeks. I am so not ready (am I ever?).

There is so much I want to get done before that first staff day but don't think it's going to happen. This summer has just been crazy busy. With the wedding, Yosemite (pictures to come later), a trip to Oregon in a couple of weeks and then on to Colorado to see my new niece.

Thank you to those of you who wished me luck on the auditions. I ended up not going. I decided that I was just too busy. Not to metion none of the shows sounded like much fun to me. I will continue to watch the audition notices for something that sounds like fun and tackle that later.

auditions

2007-07-28T09:01:00.000-07:00

I am thinking about auditioning for a series of one-act plays today at a local theatre. I had considered the possibility months ago when they first sent out the notice, without dates. Then the final notice was emailed and I was to be out of town, in Yosemite (more on the trip later), so I didn't even think about it again. Then Thursday when I arrived home I found another email from the theatre that they were having a round 2 of auditions. Today.

I have downloaded sides, I have read the play descriptions and still can't decided if any of them look worth my time. They are all original plays, but they also all sound dumb, with the exception of one or two.

So, with my mind not totally made up I may be heading to an audition in about 4 hours. Wish me "break a leg."

Picture Time!

2007-07-19T10:09:00.001-07:00

Here they are...Pictures from the wedding day.

The car was completely jammed full of stuff for the wedding. M drives an Acura, so it was a challenge to get everything from Anaheim to Temecula. But with his master packing skills we were able to do it.

Because we where having a wedding at winery we decided that the centerpieces needed to be simple, in fact the tables are the only things we decorated. We pretty much let the winery shine.

Here M is filling the wine bottles that we used as vases.

I'm putting the Gerbera Daisies into the bottles with a little bit of greenery.

We were very lucky that the winery owner was willing to give me empties every time I went to the winery, otherwise I would have had to drink 30 bottles of wine to get enough for the tables and the bars.

It's hard to see but the lables on the bottles look like they are actual wine lables, they have our names and the date where the wine type and vintage would be. We scaned a Longshadow lable and then taylored it to our wedding. They turned out really well. In fact the owner kept several to put in the tasting room with flowers in them. I can't wait to go the winery and see them.

The main winery sign, this is where people entered the lawn area.

The location looked just perfect.

We didn't do a traditional wedding ceremony. Instead of having an aisle we just had everyone gather around for the ceremony. It was nice to be surrounded by family and friends instead of feeling like we were on stage.

We didn't have any attendants, but M's girls happened to pick dresses that were very similar to each other, and with the flowers we gave them, they looked like Jr. Bridesmaids.

The lady we found to officiate the ceremony was wonderful. If you are in this area looking for someone to do a wedding I would totally recommend her. She does weddings because she loves being a part of the happiest day of people's lives.

A good friend of ours took this picture while the photographer was doing pictures, I love it. Even if it is a little blurry.

The cupcakes were a hit. Frosted in Long Beach/Belmont Shores did an amazing job. Red Velvet cake with cream cheese iceing. How can you beat that.

This was taken near the end of the night, I had a mouth full of cake and they didn't let me swallow before snapping the shot.

So, there you have it. Our wedding in a nutshell. When I get the CD from the photographer I'll post some more.

The owner of the winery actually told us that this was one of his favorite weddings done at the winery, because we kept it so simple. We didn't try to go over the top with stuff and used the beauty of the winery to our advantage.

It was just amazing.

It's Official!

2007-07-16T13:57:00.000-07:00

I'M MARRIED!!!! We are both so happy (it's almost disgusting). I will post pictures tomorrow, we just got home and now I need to change and head out to Disneyland to meet family. I would really rather stay home, open gifts and hang out, but you know how it is when family comes in from out of town.

Let me just tell you this much about the wedding....it was perfect. Absolutly nothing went wrong and everyone had a great time.

Thank you for the well wishes and happy thoughts.

final countdown...

2007-07-13T22:12:00.000-07:00

The next time you hear from me I will be a married woman. We leave tomorrow morning at 7:00am for Temecula. We have to pick up the flowers from the wholesaler. I still have lots to do, M has already gone to bed. I spent the day shopping with my good friend, L, for her birthday. I should have stayed home and done my stuff, but I wanted to see L and I was making myself crazy trying to get everything done. Now I have the quiet of everyone either gone or sleeping to finish.

My biggest stress right now is forgetting something that should go. Followed very closely with how am I going to wear my hair and will I gain weight in the next two days and not be able to fit in my dress. Because let me tell you, it is SNUG!

Anyway, off to check my list again and look for all my cute hairbobs that have never materialized since the move. I need to find 1, just 1, dragonfly bobbypin. I know I have one in the right color, I just can't find the darn thing.

Have a good one and make sure to send me happy thoughts at 6:30pm pst on Sunday.

6 days...

2007-07-08T17:36:00.000-07:00

Less than a week, here's the most recent "To Do" list...

1. Wine tags - they have been created and laminated. Now they just need to be cut out from the laminating stuff, punched and ribbon ties added. We bought this repositionable laminate that is supposed to fully set in 24 hours. As of hour 18 I could still pull the stuff apart. Which means when I cut them appart they won't be fully sealed. If I have to go buy the permanent stuff and redo them I am not going to be happy.

2. Programs - I am creating a program sheet. Just a one pager that tells everyone what time things are happening and gives a few directions. For example we aren't having a guest book, we are having a guest photo album, I may have mentioned this before. Anyway, I have people who will take their photo and then the guests will fill out a little message card which will go under their picture in the album. But if we don't give them the directions to do this we might miss someone.

3. Guest book - I have to mount the handmade paper on cardstock so it will hold up better when people write on it.

4. Wine lables- I still need to print these. The girl at Staples said that if we bought the giant sticker sheets she could copy onto them for us. When we went back to pick them up we were informed that we could not do that. So we took my jump drive and left, leaving the two other print jobs we had done sitting there unpaid for. (which means I have to have those done someplace else)

5. Accessories - I must decide on the jewles I will wear for the big event. I may post some pictures for opinions.

6. Hair - Decide if I am going to do my own or trust some strage person to do it the day of. I know this is something that should have been done months ago, but I really thought I could do my own up-d0. I have discovered I can't, I am up-do deficient. Any suggestions to this one?

7. Pack - I will be staying in Temecula for two days. Need to pack my clothes.

8. Organize Wedding Central - Our library is currently Wedding Central, I need to move it from there into the entry way and organize it for the trip down on Saturday.

9. Timeline - I need to finalize the timeline and get that out to everyone who needs it.

Okay, I think that is everything that needs to get done before I leave on Saturday morning. I have to be in Temecula to meet the wholesale florist who is coming in special for me to pick up my centerpiece flowers. We will then drop them off at the winery and I will assemble the centerpieces on Sunday after brunch. Other than my pamering that will happen that weekend, that is everything.

And if one more person from M's family asks me if I'm going to see Harry Potter with them I may have to slap someone. As much as I want to see the new movie I think I have some more important things going on. I can't believe that they have even had the nerve to ask.

7 days...

2007-07-07T19:27:00.000-07:00

There are 7 days until the wedding! I can't believe it, it has come up so fast. And what I really can't believe is that today it was spung on me that M's ex-wife (D) will be staying in Temecula as well. Because she wants to be there to get B ready for the wedding. Not that there won't be TONS of family there to take care of it. My theory, she wants to be there so she can screw things up for me and M. I could not believe what I was hearing when B made the comment on wanting to take her dress home so her mom could figure out how to do her hair. When asked how that was going to happen, we were told that her mom was going to be down there anyway and wanted to get her for a couple of hours. She wants to get her so she can get B all worked up and upset right before the wedding.

I HATE THAT WOMAN

What's worse...M is going to let her get away with it. Because even if he tells her we don't want her anywhere near the wedding, she is going to fight to do it and he will give in to her, because he doesn't want to deal with her. It kills me.

I will never bond with this child because of her mother. Her mother doesn't want B to like me. She doesn't want B to get over the divorce, she wants to create a codependent disfunctional child. And there isn't anything I can do about and nothing M will do.

what another post?

2007-07-01T20:28:00.000-07:00

Okay, I just posted, but I couldn't let this one slip by.

I just read an article on the Simpson's movie promotion being done in conjunction with 7-11. It's actually really cute, several 7-11s have been made into Kwik-E-marts for the next month, selling things such as squishies and KrustyO's. Now, here is the cool part...7-11 decided not to sell Duff Beer (Homer's favorite) because the movie is rated PG-13.

The head of marketing felt that while yes they could sell it, but why. They decided to just promote the good clean fun of it.

I thought that was pretty cool. They could have sold tons of Duff Beer, but instead decided that they would rather not because of the effect on the younger audience they will be drawing in because of the Simpson's "stuff".

This struck me so hard, that they didn't put the money first, that I sent an email to 7-11 to commend them on the decision and I have decided that I will be buying squishies and KrustyO's for the next month (the duration of the promotion).

Pretty cool, huh?

when is it enough?

2007-07-01T19:05:00.000-07:00

I live in a beautiful new home with M. I used to live in an adorable little townhouse, which I now rent to M's former roommate, R.

It was hard for me to move because I was very close to my neighbors. D and I shared a common wall between our units, we used to hang out in V&G's garage. We were all friends.

Now, R is in the townhouse. He has met D once. She had been to his house once to complain about the volume of the music. She has emailed me twice about the volume of the music. The first time M went over and talked to him, this time I sent an email to him asking him to keep it down. To his defense I also asked D for more information regarding level of the sound and the times that it is too loud. But it shoulds like it is pretty much all thetime.

Here is my dilema...when do I tell him he may have to move because of this issue. He has lived there for 2 months and I have gotten 2 complaints and the neighbor has gone over once.

M and I actually argue more about this than anything. He defends R in the not turning down the music until he is asked and I side with D on she shouldn't have to go over everytime it's too loud, he should remember at what level it was when the complaint came. Mark it on the dial for goodness sake!

I don't know what to do. When do I start looking for a new renter? How do I get it through to M that D is in the right by contacting me and she shouldn't have to go to R's house everytime it was loud. I used to play my music pretty loud and she never complained about me or to me.

Ah! The perils of being a landlord.

kind of scarey...

2007-06-23T08:00:00.000-07:00

Rising Seas Threaten to ...

A new study of the potential sand losses to North Carolina beaches reports that a 1-foot rise in sea level in the next 25 to 75 years (which is at the lower end of the range predicted by the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change) would cause the coast to move inland by 2,000 to 10,000 feet and could cost an estimated $223 million in lost recreational value by 2080 to beach-goers in that state alone.

Predicting exactly how much beaches will shrink is impossible because beach erosion rates are highly variable, even between points that are only a few miles apart. The make-up of each beach's sand, the absence or presence of jetties and other man-made structures meant to retain sand, and offshore topography (which influences wave formation), all affect erosion rates. But even with all the uncertainty, scientists say the future of our beloved sandy havens doesn’t look good. “We have no way of predicting what sea level rise will do to erosion rates, except to say that they will increase,” said Duke University geologist Orrin Pilkey, who was not involved in the new study.

Forces of Erosion Hurricanes pose a particular threat to beaches because the floods of ocean water they can push onshore, called storm surge, can wash away large amounts of sand. Typically the sand returns to the beaches (so there’s plenty available to build that sandcastle or bury your dad). But if global warming intensifies hurricanes as some have predicted (either by increasing their frequency or the strength of individual storms), it may also impair beaches’ ability to recover. For North Carolina’s beaches, the report says, even if hurricanes strike with their current frequency and intensity, sea level rise will make the effects of the storms worse. Sea level rise is another ominous potential eroding force, at least for beaches that are highly developed. When seas rise, undeveloped beaches can simply shift further inland, but because roads, buildings and other man-made structures act as a barrier, the sand at developed beaches cannot migrate backward. Effectively, relentless waves will wear away the sand and these beaches will shrink until there’s simply no sand left for sunbathing or seaside strolls. “We create the [beach erosion] problem,” Pilkey said.

Frightening Forecast for Earth

In April, scientists laid out a troubling timeline of the planet's future.
In fact, Pilkey says, the building of jetties and sea walls may be doing the most damage for now, because while they preserve a small portion of the shoreline near the structure, they actually result in more coastal erosion further from the structure than would have occurred naturally. “I suspect that may be more important than sea level rise,” he told LiveScience, but that trend will eventually change later, with global warming’s forces surpassing the impact of sea walls and jetties. For West Coast U.S. beaches, erosion from sea level rise and storms is less of a threat than on the East Coast, because the "left" coastline tends to be higher and steeper, but that doesn’t mean beach-goers there are in the clear. One of the main sources of sand for these beaches is river transport, but dams built along western rivers block this sand, which causes the beaches to erode. More Crowded Beaches

With beaches slowly vanishing from the coasts, vacationers might have to find some other way to entertain themselves and soak up the sun in the summer in the coming decades. “I’m predicting that they [will take] fewer beach trips,” said lead author of the North Carolina study John Whitehead of Appalachian State University in North Carolina. The report was funded by the National Commission on Energy Policy, a bipartisan, non-profit group of energy experts. By surveying beach-goers, Whitehead found that people prefer wider beaches, which provide more room for throwing Frisbees and eating sandy sandwiches. By determining how far people will drive to these roomier beaches and calculating the cost of those drives, Whitehead estimated the millions of dollars that would be lost to vacationers. And for those for whom the allure of a vacation at the beach is simply irresistible, few options will be left, as the only beaches to survive would likely be the ones that are undeveloped now. “People would have more limited beach options,” sociologist Maureen Harrington of Griffith University in Australia said in an email interview. “[They] would have to go to beaches that are able to migrate, that are not urbanized ... so these beaches would be more crowded.”

(c) 1999-2007 Imaginova Corp. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

Wedding Checklist Update

2007-06-21T22:56:00.000-07:00

I have been franticlly working on the wedding checklist that I posted a few days ago.

Here is the update...

1. Wine tags - I bought the paper and ribbon to make them. Now I just have to schedule the wine tag making party.

2. M&Ms - Ordered! M took care of this one for me. We still need to order the bowls from the rental company.

3. Guest book - I have the paper for this, I just need to cut it down to size and find pens that will write well on the handmade paper.

5. B and L's clothes - Haven't even thought about when to do this. Hopefully next week.

6. Flowers - I talked to a wholesale florist on Wednesday. I can get real flowers for the exact same price of the silks from them. The only problem is they aren't open on the weekend and I don't have anyplace to store them for 2 days. I am waiting for a phone call to let me know if I can pick them up on Saturday morning, while the owner is in the office working on the books. If I don't hear back tomorrow then I will call them.

7. Wine Lables - Still to need to touch up the wine lable and talk to the neighbor.

Now for things I forgot I still need to do...

8. Champagne - The winery doesn't make a champagne, but said we can bring in enough for a toast, 1 bottle per table. As a tribute to my mom's fiance who passed away last July (it will be exactly a year the day before the wedding) we are ordering his favorite champagne. We aren't going to say anything about it, we are just going to do it and people who knew him will know. I am hoping this doesn't upset my mom.

9. Wine bottles - I have 20 wine bottles that I have to soak and remove lables so I can put the centerpiece lables on.

10. Final count - I have to begin to call my guests to find out if they are coming to the wedding. I thought the online RSVP would be great! And in a way it has been. I can export the guest list and find out who is coming and who isn't. The problem seems to be that people are too freakin' lazy to get on their computers and do it. Then there are the people who are too dumb to figure out how and just email me (which is actually better than those who just tell us at really random times that they are either coming or not coming, we just tell them to go to the website and do the RSVP).

11. C-listers - We are now in the process of beginning to invite our C-listers. We have to pay for 100 people anyway, so we might as well invite those who really want to come. As long as we get closer to the 100 than we are right now I'll be happy.

As we get closer to the wedding I keep thinking of things I need to get done. And I leave to go camping for a week on Monday. I won't be able to get anything done during that week. So this weekend has to be super productive for me.

Wish me luck, because I know this list of 11 things isn't everything.

running

2007-06-19T07:26:00.000-07:00

I don't run. Anybody will tell you that my moto is that if you see me running you might want to run the same way because danger is coming.

I belong to a weightloss site and several of the girls have been talking about the Couch to 5K plan. I looked it up just so I would know what in the world they were talking about. It actually sounded like something I could do. Because as much as I say I don't run, I like the idea of running. I like the idea of being one of those people down by the beach running. (I feel the same way about cycling).

So, with this new plan, and liking the idea of running, I went to the gym, got my butt on a treadmill and did the run/walk method for week one of the Couch to 5K plan. It wasn't bad. I did it, I didn't have to stop running during any of the 60 sec segments. I think I might actually be able to stick with this one.

Now, the negative side...my ankles hurt. Not like they have been injured, but like they are asking what the hell they did to me to be punished like that.

I don't plan on giving up. Who knows, I might actually run a 5K sometime.

so much, so little

2007-06-18T11:55:00.000-07:00

I have a "To Do" list a mile long and less than a month to get it done. Yes, I'm talking about wedding planning. Everything is coming together, slowly but surely, and with a little bite to the pocketbook.

I keep hearing about people having to take out seconds on their homes to pay for weddings. I can not imagine doing that. I am freaking out at going over my $8000 budget because he ended up having to pay for a photographer (who I get to meet on Thursday). What are some of these people thinking.

It is pretty much the small details that need to be taken care of. I need to touch base with vendors and decide on some small reception type things. Remember my wedding is pretty much a reception with a wedding tossed in the middle.

Here is just a little bit of a run down on what still needs to be done:

1. Wine tags - the wedding is at a winery so almost everyone will have a wine glass. Instead of buying the wine tags I saw online, which were shapped like wedding bells, my mom and I are going to make 200 dragonfly wine tags. For those of you who don't know, I LOVE dragonflies. I really only need about 120, but might as well make some extra. We are going to die cut them with my Sisix machine and then emboss some silver on them, punch a hole and add some black ribbon. We will have silver sharpies there for people to write their names on them.

2. M&Ms - we have to order the custome M&Ms. We decided not to do favors. No sense in giving people something that will just end up in a landfill. We are going to rent bowls and have bowls of M&Ms on each table, that way people can have a little something sweet. Oh, that reminds me, we have to rent the bowls.

3. Guest book - we are doing a photo album guest book. I have two students coming to the wedding who will be in charge of making sure they take everyone's picture. To go with the pictures we will have 4x6 handmade paper for the guests to write us a message. The message will be inserted in the album under the picture. Much more interesting than a book with everyone's signatures.

4. M's clothes - we have got to buy a suit for that man. He didn't want to do it while we were in escrow (I don't blame him, I didn't want to do anything while we were in escrow), now he wants to lose some weight. The wedding is less than a month away...he needs to get off the stick.

5. B and L's clothes - we need to find dresses for the girls. L has a backup dress, which I would like her to wear, I think it is totally cute, but she wants to shop, so that is fine with me. B will be a little harder, she can't make a decision to save her life. Her mother does everything for her. Should be interesting.

6. Flowers - at first we were going to go with silk flowers, now I am thinking I might want real ones. I do know that we are doing Gerbera Daisies (my favorite). The flowers will be for the centerpieces and on the wine bars. We are doing vases out of wine bottles.

7. Wine Lables - I have designed a wine lable for the centerpieces. I am not totally happy with it, but I know some graphic designers who I am going to ask to help me spiff it up. Then my new neighbor who works for a graphic designer said she would print them for us. I feel strange going to her house and asking her about it again, but she offered, right?

I actually think that might be all of the big stuff! WOW!!!!! I think I have it down to only 7 big things that need to be done. There are lots of small things, but not a lot of big things. This is great!

So, now I am off to get some small things done.